Confusion

Something bad must have happened. That was my first thought when consciousness very slowly returned to me. Everything had been so wonderful, then there was such a long period of darkness, and now there was a massive pain in my head added onto my world of darkness. I could barely make sense of anything. I was lying in a bed. My hair had been braided, but what idiot had done that? Everyone knew how much I hated having my hair tied up completely. The pain, me being in a bed, and my hair not how I liked it truly was all I could make out. I didn't have the strength to open my eyes. I figured whatever had happened to my head must have been making me rather out of sorts. Weird beeping sounds echoed from all directions while I swore I kept hearing a woman's voice in some unfamiliar language project out from the ceiling nearby. It could only be reasoned that I was dreaming. Otherwise, I was afraid to think what being in the strange place I was in meant for me.

Strange Dreams

I knew it would happen one day, but even still...

I was not prepared for that moment when I finally realized Wesley was old. His aging had seemed to be happening so slowly. He had steadily been acquiring more wrinkles and had been complaining about his body hurting in greater quantities, but he simply had that kind of face that stayed youthful far past the youth it showed. I took it for granted that he would always stay that way. I really was in for a rude awakening. It should have been a more subtle transition as subtle is how it happened. I just hadn't been paying attention. When I looked at Wesley before, I saw him instead of his age. What should have been obvious escaped my notice. Then the obvious became clear all at once, and I was left sad and afraid. Wesley's years on this earth and with me were coming to an end. The vast amount of time it felt we had together was now steadily slipping away from us.

Try as I might, I could not speak of my realization to Wesley. It was too hard to get the words out of my mouth. He was well aware of what I was feeling though. He was dealing with the same emotions as I was. I started noticing small changes in his behavior. He was obsessed with dying his hair so that no gray could be seen, and he would sneak pain killers when he thought I couldn't see so he could complain less about how it was getting harder to move. Longer clothing that covered his arms and legs became his preference as he wanted to hide how thin and fragile his limbs had become. The only time he wore something sleeveless was at night when we went to bed. He liked when I would run my finger along his tattoo. It became amusing to me how I had worried he would regret getting it. Now it was a calming reminder of how all this had started, how much time we had had together, and that some small piece of me would forever remain with him when his time came.

What Next?

Thankfully for Wesley and I, Lenn was amazingly behaved right from the start. He naturally did have his naughty moments where I would find him chewing away at the couch leg or using the carpet as a toilet, but once we really dug into his training those incidents disappeared almost instantly. The only thing I had left to complain about was that he was constantly underfoot. His greatest enjoyment was following everyone around. He was so small, so I was really worried one of us might accidentally step on him. I was relieved when he began to grow, and he grew fast. It didn't take long before he reached his adult size. All of us were curious as to how he would turn out appearance-wise. It is safe to say Lenn is a mutt through and through. We couldn't even identify one dog breed he could be related to as he was such a mess of all sorts of features. His look definitely wasn't conventional, but I found him adorable nonetheless.

Birthdays and Babies

I found myself going to the consignment store very frequently. I don't think one day passed without me making a trip there. I got to know the workers and other frequent shoppers well. I went so often because Navinai always begged me to take her. She knew she was looking for something very specific, but she didn't know what exactly it was. All she could tell me what that she would know it when she saw it. Well, she finally saw it. The object she had been searching out was a space rock that had been dropped off just that morning. Though it was a little expensive, Navinai eagerly used her savings to purchase it immediately.

While she was distracted making her purchase, I also might have been secretly buying another bottle of wine for myself. The store carries ones of surprisingly good quality.

Pressured

Sind is an incredibly doting father. Griselda gushes to me all the time about him and how he is so wonderful. I simply smile and listen when she goes on and on. I know how he is. He has grown up quite responsible because of that little fiasco he caused. Sind also has lots of experience helping to care for his younger siblings so it's no wonder taking care of Galir comes naturally to him. I am truly glad I get to witness his and Griselda's transitions into parents first-hand. One more of my wishes has finally been fulfilled.

Daughter-in-Law

Sind and Griselda's wedding was quite unlike Elioviel and Morti's. The two of them barely wanted a ceremony at all. They told us we didn't even have to dress up if we didn't want to. I dressed up, but the rest of the children didn't. Sind and Griselda truly didn't care. That's just how they like things- simple. We had a small private ceremony in the backyard. Though the wedding was performed in such an unusual manner, it was sweet and intimate and I teared up the same as I always have.

TGO New Years Special! Behind the Scenes 2!

In the last Behind the Scenes post created in celebration of The Goddess' Order one year anniversary, I went through all the pictures I had taken of the goofy things my Sims had done since I started the challenge. I have gathered even in just these past few months more than enough pictures for another Behind the Scenes update. Thus, I am uploading this as a special surprise New Years update. Don't worry. You'll get the normal update tomorrow as well (:

We start pretty much around the same time where we left off last time. It is the day of Elioviel and Morti's wedding...

Which Ellothiel clearly wanted to upstage. She pulled out a quick session of poses I've never seen from her before or even seen in general. It was unexpected, but very fun to watch. I think she is trying to look like a model or something here,

but the whole thing quickly goes derpy.

The Good and the Bad

Even with all the craziness being conducted by my lovely children, I somehow managed recently to find a small window of time where I could go to the spa to get a massage without wondering what the house's condition would be when I returned home. It's been a long time since I've been able to splurge money on myself in such a manner, which is highly freeing. We are slowly but steadily getting to the point where money to pay the bills is no longer my first worry. I suppose though that even if our savings were lacking more that the massage still would have been necessary. This child I'm carrying is in a different position than normal, and is causing me much more pain because of it.

Getting to Know You

Normally, the thieves come late at night. This almost guarantees them that everyone inside will be asleep. Thus, it would be easier to swipe things without notice. However, the thief that came this time thought she would have an easier time if she snuck in when the sun started to rise and everyone in the house began waking and preparing for the day.

I was able to stop the alarm before it crippled me as it always does, and I blocked the door so the thief couldn't run back out. She stood there quivering in fear as we waited for the police to come collect her. They arrived five minutes later, and took her away in handcuffs. I have always wondered why the thieves never came to the little house. They actually could have stolen stuff there. There is no chance of the same here. You would also think word would get out that this is not an easy place to steal from after all the failed attempts.

Return

I've been able to write a little more recently, which has been incredibly calming. Even the droll of typing page after page after page is better than dirty diaper after dirty diaper after dirty diaper. Then there's all the crying, temper tantrums, and quarrels. I can't remember what silence sounds like.

Treachery

As I feared, the birth of Lomenia, Lithaldoren, and Lueth made an extension to the house more than necessary. We would have had to get rid of everything in the living room to otherwise accommodate them. I thought our family was going to face a huge setback for our goal of returning home. Blessedly, the extension did not cost nearly as much as I anticipated. My older children chipped in yet again, and we also received a large amount of money from another source. I told Elioviel and Morti not to leave me anything. They had to worry about their own children instead. However, despite the many times I told them I did not want money left to me in their wills they went ahead with doing just that. It was frustrating, but with how badly I needed the money I could not decline their offer of love.

On a completely different note, I realized something interesting after the triplets and I worked out some semblance of a schedule for them where I could get more sleep. This is the first time since it was only Elrunamir and Ureliel where the children I've birthed for this task have been equal in numbers for both genders. I've now given birth to 32 boys and 32 girls.

History Repeated

It was bittersweet that the day had to come, but Renia's birthday did come. I still haven't seen Penn's clean face. It's hard to say exactly what he looks like when he has his make-up on. One thing is for sure though, he helped me to make one gorgeous daughter. Even as an adult, Renia hasn't picked up her father's wacky tendencies. Not that I was expecting she would. They've always been so different. Renia has become a bit more a couch potato since she graduated, which worries me that she might have burned herself out a little too much. She picked up many excellent writing skills at her part-time job though, and she has decided to become a full-time writer. It was hard having her go, but it was also nice to have a proper bed to sleep in again.

Looking Up

Life has improved somewhat drastically over the past few months. While the scammer did away with all of our family's investments, the bank was able to work through some of the mess that was made to obtain our last payments. That means we were suddenly gifted with over $50,000. I wanted to cry from relief, and I almost did. That money wasn't enough to buy our house back, but it was certainly enough to make this house we're in nicer. For starters, I purchased a television for the children and a better computer to do my writing on.

Starting Over

Time has passed by slowly as we've all adjusted to our new way of living, but then I look at the calendar and I see just how many months have actually gone by. Melui and Cethiel naturally can't tell the difference between this house and our old one, but Renia, Sind, and I can. It's very difficult getting used to the change. We're so very cramped in this place. We can't go anywhere without bumping into each other. There's absolutely no privacy at all. It's driving us crazy. There's also nothing for any of us to do. All we have for entertainment is a bookshelf with the books I've written, and an old clunky computer I bought so I could continue writing.

Even that thing was almost more than I could afford, but we need some sort of income if we ever want to get our house back. That has become my goal. I probably won't ever find out who stole all our money though someone is apparently looking into the crime. Whether or not a suspect is found, I refuse to let the scammer win. We'll win our house back through hard work. I refuse to let my children see me complain even though I feel pretty pathetic now that I can only provide them with so little. I can't even afford to make anything other than pb&js.

Too Good to Be True

My toddler and my baby had their birthday on the same day so now I have a child and a toddler instead. We celebrated Sind and Melui's birthdays together. As soon as he aged up, Sind began to show signs that there was something a bit off with him. His actions remind me a bit of how Joseph acted, which is worrying. However, then he changes so quickly and acts completely normal and sweet. He absolutely adores being a big brother. Sind plays with Melui all the time, and actually gets angry sometimes when I interrupt.

Unsupervised

It might have been raining, but I ignored the weather and took Sind with me across the street to Maywood Glen. I had just been in the house for so long that I had to get out despite the water falling from the sky. I have to admit that it isn't for legitimate reasons that I haven't really left the yard, but that I've been hiding myself. I don't want anyone to ask me questions about this pregnancy. It is not as if I can lie. The truth will be revealed when this child is born, but what sane person will not think me crazy when I do tell the truth? I chose to go to the Glen when it was raining to avoid people, and thus avoid the questions.

Thankfully, the rain truly was light. It was also warm and felt good as it dripped onto ours heads. Sind was having the time of his life playing in the small puddles. I picked the wild fruits and vegetables while he was preoccupied. That helped me to spend less time in the grocery store afterwards getting the rest of what our fridge needed. It was very lucky that no one else was at the store save for a grumpy cashier who had no desire to talk. Sind and I returned home without problem.