The Presence

Honestly, I pretty much forgot about the time I spent with Henry. It had been a moment that was so routine and uninteresting compared to all the highs I had experienced with Wesley, so it took the bulging of my stomach to remind me that I was carrying another child. I became excited then. My first thought was hoping to have another girl, but there was a strangely confident thought within my mind whispering over and over again that the child would be a boy. I wanted to find out to prove my hopes superior, but this was not one of the pregnancies where I would find out ahead of time. I've done a good job up until this point of keeping to the tradition I decided on. It would have been a shame to break it.

Henry ended up being excited too when he heard I was pregnant. Sort of. His excitement certainly isn't anything compared to the real excitement that had been so obvious with Wesley when I was pregnant with Amonost and Adonnen. I'm just glad Henry is willing to try though, and isn't going to shirk off his responsibilities.

I had expected Henry's not-the-most-excited kind of excitement, but the reaction I got from Wesley when I told him was not at all the reaction I was anticipating. I was under the impression he would be glad or at least simply accept the truth, but he actually struggled quite a lot. He just pulled this face that clearly showed he was not pleased. He didn't say anything directly about being upset, but it was clear by his actions that night that he was indeed upset. I suppose this was the reaction I should have known was coming. Wesley and I might have broken off all romantic ties with each other, but there will always remain that deep bond between us. We also can't erase our history. It was only natural then that Wesley remained possessive of me even though we have long since ceased sleeping with each other. Now I had given him the first real proof to the reality that we really never are going to end up together. That we've steadily been seeing less and less of the other surely didn't help Wesley either. I think the slow separation is for the best though. We'll never stop being friends, but if Wesley is meant to date other women or get married again then it isn't possible for that to happen if he spends all of his free time over here.

I was glad when Wesley returned to his normal, happy self when Amonost and Adonnen had their birthday. He came over from work with a whole bunch of decorations just like last time. It was heartwarming to see the boys being so merry at decorating for their own party- even if they made more of a mess instead of actually helping out. Amonost and Adonnen look ever more like Wesley as they grow. It is going to be a strange thing when they become adults and the three of them stand right next to each other. I'm glad Amonost has my eyes and Adonnen has my hair, or else when it reaches that point I might not be able to tell them apart. With their birthday, Amonost has remained the quieter twin while Adonnen is energetic as always. However, the both of them have simultaneously become mildly inappropriate. They laugh and say things at all the wrong times. Since they do it when it will make me most embarrassed, I wonder if it is their way of pulling pranks.

It wasn't just my twin boys who had their birthday though. My twin girls had theirs as well. It was somewhat bittersweet to have the birthdays so close together, but it was also enjoyable since the celebration never seemed to stop. As always, Elrandra and Emethien have remained quite the duo. In fact, Elrandra has recently developed a desire to tinker and invent like Emethien has been fond of doing for so long. I can't express to you how overjoyed Emethien was when Elrandra asked her to teach her about making little mechanical things. It helped bring them even closer together.

I was pleased, naturally, at how absolutely gorgeous my twin girls turned out. However, I was even more pleased at how much depth there was underneath their beauty. I think others might lack faith in them for a while due to their feminine appearances, especially because Elrandra wants to become involved in politics and Emethien wants to join the army. I know they have the strength within them though to prove that they can be successful at anything despite what their outward appearances suggest.

The two got to have a bit of an extra special birthday for theirs ended up being on the same day as Snowflake Day. I had already been planning on throwing a big party, so that big party grew bigger. I planned a large celebration because it would be the first time in a long time where Rithranduil would come. It was going to be even more joyous as he has managed to make up with the rest of his siblings who he had fallen out with. That I could watch him and Tinaldor stand there and talk and laugh as if nothing had happened was the best gift I got all evening.

And there was a lot of gifts. All of my children living in Twinbrook showed up, and a few of their fathers managed to come as well. Wesley's presence was a given too. The house was ridiculously crowded. The entire first floor was filled to capacity as everyone milled about having a great time. I had a hard time finding space to navigate in order to get to speak with all the guests.

Seeing as Elrandra and Emethien had become adults, they did leave for good after the party was done though. The two of them were going to be living in a house on the other side of town along with one of their friends. I helped them all pick it out. It might be a little more expensive than what my children normally get when they first move out, but with three of them having decent jobs and being rather responsible I didn't worry all that much.

I was honestly more worried about Nora. She, Elrandra, and Emethien always got up earlier than Amonost and Adonnen on school days so they could eat breakfast together in peace. I happened to wake up early on the first day of school once break ended, and I spotted Nora looking so bored as she ate alone at that big table. I went to eat with her, but it was obvious she already was missing her best friends.

The household got a lot quieter after my twin girls left. I even grew to miss the sounds of Emethien's constant tinkering. However, I was glad the amount of people living with me was somewhat smaller again. I finally had time to do things I had had to put off for so long- like my writing. I had been doing so well with it as I churning out successful book after successful book. Then all that stress had come, and I barely had time to keep up with everyone never mind doing anything else. Well, now I am getting closer to finishing a novel I began working on back before I left for my vacation and met Wesley. I had been having trouble with it seeing as it was definitively in the Romantic genre, which was something I had not tried before. However, I have become much more confident with the material thanks to the vacation and meeting Wesley. I should finish it before too long.

I am glad for the shorter winters here. Spring arrived without me even knowing it was coming, which left me pleasantly surprised. It was nice to see flowers already blossoming to life. A bit of snow still remained on the ground though, but Amonost and Adonnen liked the setup a lot. The warmer weather meant they could stay outside and run around for as long as they desired, yet they could continue to build the snowmen and other such creations they had grown so fond of making during the winter. Amonost and Adonnen wished it could be like this forever. I think it will be a nice atmosphere for a while, but I know I'm already looking forward to summer.

That little whisper in the back of my head had been right. The child I had been carrying was a boy. I gave birth to Cadrier around one in the afternoon while the rest of the children were at school. It was relaxing not to have to worry about watching over them. However, I believe even if Nora, Ris, Amonost, and Adonnen had been home this labor still would have been better than my last. Unless it is my destiny to carry quadruplets again, which I desperately pray it isn't, then it is my resolve to never give birth in a hospital again. Wesley enjoys telling the story of how terribly the staff and I got along. I make sure each time to remind him the craziness and frustration that happened was all his fault. He just smiles and shrugs.

I got to spend that hour or two cuddling Cadrier alone before Nora returned. It really is ridiculous to judge a child's personality so soon after they are born, but I feel it is safe to say Cadrier at least has a pretty average temperament. I was pleased with that, and also that he looks a lot like Henry. It was saddening that Wesley was much more proactive about coming over to see him than Henry was. Henry has been making the effort to be involved, but I am thankful Wesley is around to pick up the slack that Henry does unfortunately leave behind.

With Amonost and Adonnen growing older, Elrandra and Emethien having their birthday and moving out, and Cadrier's birth, I felt like the household had been given quite the shake. I was glad that things appeared to be settling down and falling into a new routine. However, there was still some more shaking up that had to be done. I had taken a look at the calendar, and I was in for a shock when I realized Ris was going to be having her birthday soon as well. I barely completed the preparations when the day arrived. She spent the morning with Roy, the afternoon with her friends, and the evening at home. Ris became a little annoyed as I started clinging to her with sudden hugs, but I couldn't help myself.  My adorable baby girl was simply growing into a beautiful young lady too fast. Her sudden desire to be more ambitious in everything she did also began maturing her more rapidly than I liked.

Then, Goddess bless me, Nora had her birthday too! I suppose all these birthdays so close together is what happens after a period of stability. It doesn't make the growing up of everyone any easier though. Yet, it was less painful for me to accept that Nora was an adult than for me to accept that Ris would be starting high school. This was because she was finally getting the chance to live with Rithranduil, and the chance to be a family with him for a change. Rithranduil and I had discussed back when everyone reconciled about giving him legal custody of Nora, but we realized by the time the process was complete that Nora would be an adult and the point would be moot anyway. Nora didn't mind. She actually preferred waiting until she graduated to move.

Her going to live with Rithranduil, and them really solidifying their relationship as father and daughter has been a dream of mine for so long. I naturally couldn't help but to cry then when I said a momentary farewell to my dear granddaughter in the exact same place where I first laid eyes on her.

It was surprisingly strange having the children in the house be all directly mine for a change. It did make things a bit easier though when I referred to them as a collective though instead of having to clarify to others that there was a grandchild in the group as well.

Ris was sad to see Nora go, for she missed having a female sibling-like figure around. She tried to make me promise that the next child I had would be a girl. Obviously there was no way I could promise that, but the only way to calm her pouting was to remind her that by the time I had the next child she would be on the eve of graduating. Ris realized she had to find another subject with which to preoccupy her time after hearing that disappointment. Since she has always enjoyed music, she bought a violin and began practicing. It definitely pained all of our ears to listen at first, but Ris blessedly became adept at the instrument quickly. Though Ris prefers traditional songs, Amonost and Adonnen love dancing wildly to hilarious effects.

I was mistaken when I thought after Ris and Nora's birthdays that the household was definitely done with its shift. However, there was one more birthday that felt like it came too soon. I blinked, and Cadrier had already become a toddler. Henry came over for his birthday, and revealed to me our son's red hair came from Henry's mother. It was a good thing to know because the coloring had been a curiosity for me. Cadrier might have his grandmother's hair, but he appears so much like Henry otherwise.

He is a little difficult to teach. He would rather play than learn new words or attempt walking. I have to change his schedule of playing and learning so often. I don't mind the difficulty though, for it means I get a lot of quality time with my youngest son.

After several more weeks, all of the snow had been melted away by the ever rising temperatures. A bit of chill remained on the wind, but it was refreshing. With such great weather, I thought would be a good idea to take the children out to the spring festival on the weekend. They always like when I suggest me taking them since it means they're spending my money instead of theirs. On the other hand, they then grumble when I make them do family activities. We all win and lose a little. I really had meant for us to spend a good portion of the day together, but when Ris saw that Rithranduil was at the park as well she rushed up to him to ask him to teach her how to drive without a second thought about the rest of us. I would have been more annoyed if all of the other attempts Ris had made at getting someone to teach her hadn't fallen through. Rithranduil agreed to her request, and I let her go. They circled the park for a while before disappearing further into town.

Since Rithranduil had been at the park, we weren't surprised at all to see Nora there as well. However, there was quite an amusing incident. Nora was participating in the festival egg hunt for whatever reason. Adonnen went over to say hi to her, but she was so into searching around that she completely overlooked him. Adonnen was a bit upset at her not acknowledging him. Nora realized her error, bought him a popsicle, and all was right with the two.

Nora continued to make many efforts in finding as many festival eggs as possible, but Amonost was the winner in the end. All the others looking for the eggs just ran around wildly. Amonost thought about it systematically, and such thinking worked in his favor. He didn't win anything other than the candy already in the eggs, but you can believe I was one proud mother.

Amonost and Adonnen played some games together while I held Cadrier as he splashed his hands in the fountain. He was getting wetter than I liked, but he was having such fun I hadn't had the heart to pull him away. He did cry a little when it really was time to stop. I found something to cheer him up though. Music that was more uptempo than before was being played over the speaker system. The twins rushed to the dance floor, and I decided to join in. Amonost and Adonnen were going at it without abash as usual, and Cadrier laughed his head off as I swayed and spun him. It was a wonderful time.

I did eventually need a break from my sons. Nora agreed to hold Cadrier and keep an eye on the twins. I busied myself by walking about and studying all the topiary sculptures that had been placed about the park. They were so remarkably done, and I began to think about how it could be fun to learn how to do such sculpting myself. I got the most enjoyment out of staring at the dragon and panda. Seeing them reminded me of the trip I took to China with Londuil and Ninnor. It always astounds me when I think back to how long ago that trip was. A desire to travel there or even back to France sprung up within my chest. Perhaps another trip can be arraigned the next time Eloril comes to visit. In his most recent letters he says he wants to come see me again. It certainly has been a long enough span of time since he and ada were here with me last.

I was just about to turn away from the topiaries when I suddenly froze. I froze because I could feel it- the presence of the man Rithranduil had warned was watching the family. I looked straight ahead towards the direction where I could sense him, but there was no one at least in sight that was suspicious. All I could see was a mother and son. There was definitely someone else across the street though. Without waiting a second longer, I bolted across the road. It was a bit stupid as I hadn't bothered to check for traffic, and I was blessedly lucky the road was empty. It was if I had a radar on the man, for I noticed his recognition that I was on to him. He began running. There was so little distance between us that I was sure I would catch him. I pride myself on being a pretty fast runner.

Unfortunately, the man was no slowpoke himself. I turned the corner to go into the alley and not only was there no one there, but the presence of the man was completely lost as well. I hurriedly ran around the buildings hoping to catch him. He either had truly managed to escape or was a very good hider. I even went inside the businesses that were open, but it quickly became clear my quarry had gotten away. Honestly, as I walked back to the park, my emotions were more that of curiosity than concern. It is similar to what I said when Rithranduil first told me someone was watching us. Though I had indeed felt the man's presence, there was nothing dangerous about it. I couldn't help but to think there was a real reason for his behavior besides ill will or some creepy fantasy.

I pushed the whole thing to the back of my mind when I went to retrieve my children from Nora. Thankfully, none of them had noticed my adventure. I wasn't the mood to answer questions about my peculiar actions, and I also didn't want to worry anyone. Rithranduil and I had agreed to keep the truth of our watcher a secret.

The day was getting late, and all of my boys were getting hungry. My plan was to head back home. This was mostly because Cadrier is still young enough that the majority of his meals come from me nursing him, and after all these years I remain somewhat self-conscious nursing in public even if I used the biggest blanket imaginable. I understand that I don't need to be embarrassed, but call it my own personal quirk if you will. Amonost and Adonnen complained that they were starving though, and had to eat right then. I gave in. We all ordered some nice, greasy, festival food. Cadrier munched on a bit of mine, which I knew would at least tide him over until we got home. I was disapproving when Amonost ordered something called a grasshopper pie instead of a real dinner, but I suppose it really wasn't that much worse than what I was eating. Adonnen came over a few seconds later with a hamburger. With my sons and I sitting there eating, talking, and having a good time, my close encounter with the man truly did leave my mind completely.....