Thursday, February 13, 2014

Make-Believe


I woke up before Wesley the next morning. I showered and dressed, and the lights were still off in his room. I decided to go ahead and have breakfast so he could sleep some more. Apparently, this was the wrong thing to do. Wesley was not happy I hadn't woken him up. I had gone ahead and had what should have been our first meal as an official unofficial couple together without him. As a result, I had a second breakfast. I didn't mind since I really do love the resort's food, and I thankfully hadn't eaten all that much the first time around.

It was incredibly warm that morning. It only made since to start the day off at the beach snorkeling. I waited while Wesley got the gear, and when he showed up I spotted the tattoo on his shoulder that I had completely forgotten about. I naturally had to ask Wesley the particulars about the design. Well, he started, I had made a brief mention the day before that my name related to a type of flower. So he had gotten a flower design. The green was for my eyes, the lilac was because it was my favorite color, the white was because I had this pure aura around me, and the black was simply to hold it altogether.

I stared at Wesley in confused amazement. He couldn't actually be serious about all of that. Wesley was perfectly serious though. I couldn't believe him. That tattoo was permanent. Why on earth had he thought it would be a good idea to base the whole thing around me? Wesley repeated what he had said the previous night. Meeting me had helped me more than I would know, and more than he was ever going to let me know. The tattoo ensured that he had a way to think back to good times once we separated. I still couldn't get the whole thing to make sense in my head, but I had to just accept what he told me. It's not like there was any way the tattoo could be changed.


I really had thought we were going snorkeling. When Wesley put the words "beach" and "gear" together in the same sentence, what else was I supposed to think? Wesley had something completely different in mind though. We weren't going to be swimming on the water's surface. We were going to be surfing on it. I stood still in fright when I was shown the two windsurfers. There was no chance I was ever going to get on one. I was terrified, and I knew nothing about the activity or how to do it. Wesley, the stubborn man that he can be, refused to let me back out. He had already paid the money to rent both windsurfers. We thus spent a lot of time on the beach with him giving me proper instruction and training. Ever so slowly was I prodded into the water where I resigned to my fate.

I was glad there was a lot of open space. My control was horrendously terrible at first, so I was going all over the place. I fell more than I would like to admit. However, after much help from Wesley I was able to get the hang of it. Not only was I able to properly follow him, I even enjoyed myself.


The wind pulled us to the other side of the main island. Thankfully, there was a sister shop to the one Wesley had gotten the windsurfers from where we could return them. We switched them out for fishing rods instead. Wesley and I took a break on an empty pier to see what we could catch. Honestly, I've never liked fishing in the slightest. I enjoyed the break from strenuous movement and the opportunity to get to talk with Wesley more though. We stopped paying attention to pretty much everything- including the deadline by which the rods were due back. The little extra money we paid was worth it, and the outing had been too much fun. Wesley and I even managed to hook a few fish, but due to our lack of experience they quickly slipped back into the ocean.


The two of us wandered about afterwards. We walked around half the island before a stop at the festival for a snack and a drink was necessary. I had just finished eating when I noticed Wesley seemed distracted. I asked him what was the matter, and he suddenly pulled me along to lead me to an area where we began slow dancing. There was little I could do to stop myself from laughing. The music playing did not suit slow dancing, and we received a lot of stares because of our silliness. All those stares were ignored. Wesley and I were having fun being ridiculous. There were two instances where his hand slid too low and I had to bring it up to its proper place. Truthfully, I did not actually mind the motion. Even more truthfully, feelings of desire had begun to stir within me. It was simply because were in such a crowded place with so many children around that I stopped Wesley's advances.


It was relieving Wesley came to the same conclusion, and we preoccupied ourselves with other activities there at the festival. It wasn't too much later though when Wesley became tired. We really hadn't gotten that much sleep the previous night, and now that we had been going all day that lack of rest was catching up to him. Our solution was to find a nice, quiet spot where the two of us could lay down and relax. And that's exactly what we did.

Wesley told me more about his life, which was that he was an only child who had resided in the suburbs of a large city on the east coast for most of his life until his family had moved to a city further west right before he started high school. Wesley had liked the new city well enough, but he had moved back to the coast after graduation. Since then he had spent his days working as a manager at a sports equipment store. While he had been offered a better position several times, he had refused each as he would have had to work in an office and wear a suit and tie. That was not his style, and I agreed.

I didn't consider while I was listening that him telling me more about his life would mean that he would want to know more about mine afterwards. I panicked. I didn't want to lie, but I couldn't think of any way to tell the truth while not telling the truth quick enough. I liked that Wesley thought I was human like him. I never would have believed in the past that I would want to be counted as one of them, but pretending to be human was somehow freeing in this particular situation. To get out of saying anything I had to pretend I was really tired. My attempt at stopping the conversation worked. Wesley was asleep against the ground less than a minute later. He truly was exhausted. I lay there against him simply mulling things over.


Wesley slept for about an hour, and we went back to the resort. Our original intention had only been to grab a bit more cash. However, Wesley spotted the coal and walk and instantly decided he had to try it. He asked if I would do it too, but this was one thing he was never going to be able to convince me to attempt. It was clear from the expression on his face that Wesley believed he could handle the pain. It was even more obvious he regretted his decision as soon as his feet touched the coals. He was a courageous trooper though for he not only completed the walk all the way until the end but pretended his feet were perfectly fine. I convinced him to let me put some aloe on his them before we left, at which point Wesley revealed he was glad I had made the suggestion.


We did manage to get some snorkeling in. Since we went to a better place where not many people went I hoped I might be able to find something. Unfortunately, there was nothing. Wesley cheered me up by saying I was improving quickly though. The chances were good that I could do some actual diving before my vacation was over. That I could have the chance was something I truly looked forward to. It was mostly why I kept snorkeling after Wesley grew tired again and retreated to shore when normally I would have stopped with him. He was clearly impressed, and a bit stunned, that I really did seem to have an endless amount of energy. I knew then that I had to tell him the truth. I made up my mind to tell him the next day as waiting too much longer would surely have bad consequences.


When Wesley and I ended up at the same restaurant in the same seats for dinner we knew we had to make going there a habit of sorts, but we would try something different each time. I went with a nice salad. Wesley went with grilled salmon. We pretty much ate half of the other's place, which felt like a good way to do things. Dessert was a large piece of cheesecake were shared.


It was getting late again. Our intention had been to head back to the resort at a proper hour, but that turned out not to be the case at all. We happened to walk by a place where one could rent motor boats when Wesley got his second wind. He thought it was a great idea to explore the really tiny islands while the waters were clear and open to us. I had no reason with which to disagree. It was the most wonderful time getting to speed around not having to worry about bothering anyone else. I only realized the moon hung perfectly overhead when we stopped at an isolated island with a tiny beach covered in many large plants. It was secret and secluded.

There was large picnic blanket we found in the boat that we spread over the sand. The situation became a repeat of the previous evening. Wesley and I lay there against each other staring up at the stars. However, the ending of the situation really was completely different. We didn't talk much, but Wesley and I steadily began to press closer against the other. There was absolutely no one around. With the way Wesley was holding me it was no surprise the desires I had felt earlier in the day flared up again. I just didn't anticipate how strongly those desires would take hold of me though. I began to think how nice it would be to kiss Wesley, and it took me a few seconds to realize what I believed were only thoughts of me kissing him were, in reality, actions.

That's how lost in my passion I was. I fully expected Wesley to pull away, but he instead eagerly welcomed the advance. We both understood where the whole thing was going. We both wanted to go there. Then I thought everything was going to be ruined. Wesley brushed his hand under my hair against the side of my head. I froze when he froze when he felt my ear. Naturally, he was very surprised. He confusedly pointed out that I had very large ears. I had no choice but to tell the truth- I was an elf. Wesley was more confused. He had always been told the elves never came over from their side of the wall. Well, I was a special case, I told him. I began to apologize profusely for not saying anything, but Wesley quieted me with a small kiss. He was not upset. All the revelation did was clear some things up for him, but it didn't change the person I was or how he viewed me. Relief flooded my chest, and before I knew it we were continuing our little session.


In the back of my mind I knew despite the late hour and current solidarity of our location that Wesley and I could be caught right in the middle of everything. Strangely, I knew I would not care even if that did happen. Coming from me, that's saying something. The passion truly had taken control. I was at Wesley's mercy despite the fact that he relinquished the control that would normally be his over to me. That's only happened a few times out of all of the experiences I've had, and it only increased my desire.

I wondered why I was being so strongly affected. One would think after all these years and all the times I've slept with a man that I wouldn't be easily swayed in getting carried away during one of those moments. However, I eventually figured out the reason. What I had wanted so desperately was finally there- or Wesley and I were at least pretending it was there. In that one blessed moment I was allowed to believe I had what I had been denied and would most likely never have. Wesley was mine. I was his. And we would be together eternally. The love that had always been missing in my love-making was there in make-believe.


Wesley stayed in my room that night. Neither of us wanted to be separated from the touch of the other. For me, being wrapped in his arms there was this sense of security and safeness that I had never experienced before. I was afraid the sensation would leave and never return if I let Wesley go. That's why it didn't take too long before we came up with the idea for Wesley to move into my room. It made perfect sense. Him staying with me would save us both money.


And as the next several days passed, it became a safe retreat for our more adult activities.


There were times where I couldn't believe Wesley was the same man who did all those activities with me though. One day we took a dip in the resort pooling seeing as how we needed to swim in there at least once during our stay. Everything was going fine, and we were having a wonderful time. I got lost in my thoughts for a moment, and the next thing I know Wesley had vanished. A pitiful little voice then called my name. I looked up to find Wesley frozen with fright at the top of the water slide. When I asked what he was doing he told me he had wanted to go down, which left me confused as to what the problem was. Wesley, apparently, was terrified of heights. He had to be kidding me. He was only seven feet off the ground!

Wesley was not kidding. I had to ask why he had even gotten on the slide in the first place. "I don't know!" was the rational response I got. Wesley asked me if I would come help him get down, but I told him if he could get up there by himself then he could get down by himself. I wished I had had a video camera on me. I tried not to laugh too loudly as Wesley shifted uncertainly while he tried to decide what he should do. Then I started to feel guilty because, as ridiculous as it seemed, he was truly scared.


I got out of the pool to help him since he kept begging me. However, he shifted too much as he tried to turn to go back down the steps. That one little slip combined with the water running down the slide caused Wesley to shoot down like a bullet out a barrel. The expression on his face was like one who was about to meet death. Of course, Wesley landed quite safely in the pool. I mysteriously managed to keep my laughter under control even then as I offered him a hand out. Wesley was pouting pretty hard.


It was around lunchtime when something absolutely crazy happened. I honestly thought it was a dream or that I was seeing things incorrectly. The amount of time I had to stare to get myself to believe what my eyes were seeing began to make Wesley look at me strangely. How could I not stare though? The girl hadn't noticed me, but I obviously I was well aware of her. It was unmistakably elf ears that were poking through those brown strands of her hair after all.

As surprised as I was to see what I originally thought was another elf, the real truth was much more shocking. There was no chance I was just going to let the girl walk away without saying anything to her. However, though I went right up to her I had no idea what to say. The result was the two of us standing awkwardly with her being very hesitant about me. I forced my voice to work, and asked her about her ears. The girl, who told me her name was Raine Thomas, said the ears had been in her family for many generations. She had gotten them from her father. Raine smiled a bit. She said she wondered if I could believe her father's side of the family was descended from an elf.


I think my heart stopped beating for a few good seconds. I made Raine feel awkward again since I stared at her not being able to comprehend the event that was most likely occurring. When she was about to get fed up with me I pulled back my hair to show her my own ears. Raine became excited. She thought I had to be related to the same elf. She had had a lot of children. Then I told her my name. Raine's face turned blank as the stunning realization slowly dawned on her as it had hit me. She said she knew the child of the elf she was descended from was named Elaril. I said he had been my third child- the first born with my ears. We again stood still in shock. I truthfully had a hard time moving past the fact that my ears had been passed so far down the line. Coming to terms with the fact that a descendent of my second baby boy was in front of me was impossible to grasp.

Wesley came over to find us standing and staring there like idiots. He asked what was going on. Raine began explaining the basic idea of what we had just discovered. She and I then slightly pushed Wesley out of the conversation as I began pondering about her family. Raine said they knew I was still out there somewhere continuing the task, but they had no clue as to where I had been or where I had gone. I felt bad. I had tried to hard to keep track of my descendents, but given that Raine was approximately my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-granddaughter it's no wonder I stopped being able to keep up with everyone. It was as she began telling me more about her home life when I noticed there was pure confusion plastered on Wesley's face. I hadn't even thought what the conversation would sound like to him who essentially knew nothing. He asked what was going on more intently than before. I had told him I only had five children. How could this girl be my descendent of so many generations? What task did she keep mentioning?


I was left with no choice but to tell Wesley the truth, and tell him right then. I said to Raine that we needed a minute, and Wesley followed me to a quiet corner of the resort. It was hard to get the words out. Once I began speaking everything flew out though. I think Wesley had a hard time keeping up. There were very few details I left out. I cannot recall just how long we stood there as the whole story was revealed. I broke down towards the end. I always hate having to reveal the most hurtful things. I hate having to think of those painful memories. Getting to Sind's death, of which the grief was still so near, was too much. My state had become quietly hysterical. I apologized over and over for lying to Wesley again. I fully expected him to reject me for it had to look like I was crazy.

However, in true Wesley fashion, he embraced me instead. He comforted me and reassured me that I had never lied to him. I simply hadn't told him all the details, which was perfectly acceptable given my story. Then he did what he could to comfort me about all the other burdens plaguing my heart. There was a little he could actually do about them, but the gesture was much appreciated. Really, it was his embrace that did most of the calming down. Wesley truly is one of those people who is so reliable and just makes you feel safe. His wife was a fool of a woman for letting him go. I eventually stopped crying, and Wesley helped me clean my ace up. Everything was alright, he told me. I needed to perk up some. I was going to have a miraculous meeting who was proof my son's legacy lived on. I nodded.


Wesley went to take a nap, and Raine and I sat down after she dropped her things off in her room. She had actually just checked in. This vacation was a gift from her grandparents as a present for finishing college with great grades. Raine loved animals, and wanted to be a veterinarian. After that, she told me she had two older brothers. The older one has the elf ears like she and her father do. They all lived in the northeast part of the country where her family runs a local general goods store that her mother's side opened up two generations ago. Watching Raine talk was just as wondrous as getting to listen to her talk. Her face was so bright and eager, especially when she talked about her goals for the future. I couldn't help but to think of Elaril when I looked at her.

We both talked excitedly when we discussed the time where Raine could at least introduce me to her family over the phone. I really do have so many descendents I've never known about. I remained in awe for quite some time. Until meeting this young lady in front of me, I had not been able to understand just how far what I've given has spread. It was amazing when I thought more deeply about it. Elaril had five children, 14 grandchildren, and 39 great-grandchildren. That's when I lost count. I myself have 164 grandchildren alone. I can't even imagine what the number of children who have come from all of my children's children's children's and so on is like.

Raine continued to talk, but I tuned out for a few seconds as my thoughts overpowered me. Meeting Raine had quickly become a blessing in more ways than one. I loved that I was getting the chance to know her, but she helped me to see there truly is a greater purpose in completing the task. All the hard work I've done does actually mean something, which is something I think I had lost sight of. Putting it bluntly, without me and without my efforts Raine wouldn't even exist. She never would have had the chance to make the great difference I know she will make.


Raine was curious about Wesley and our relationship. I didn't have to explain too much before she smiled and said she got it. I let Raine know that while she had come here having her own plans, she was welcome to join Wesley and I for most of our activities. There was obviously those instances like the one night on that tiny island which no one should be around for.

Raine did want to spend the day with us. Wesley was a good sport about her joining in our "us" time. In fact, the two quickly became like a pair of siblings. They both got great enjoyment out of teaming up on me. They thought they would be able to clobber me in a water balloon fight. Wesley and Raine would soon find out sheer skill would overpower numbers any day.


The three of us made true fools of ourselves all day, but with most of the other vacationers pretty much doing the exact same thing we weren't out of place. I noticed I was rapidly becoming addicted to the freedom the islands offered as I did so much I never would have dared to attempt at home. I honestly considered calling Tinaldor to tell him to get ready to move the family here. Then I got a grip on myself. Living here was probably much different than vacationing here, and I couldn't uproot my family on such a whim. I knew I had to enjoy the freedom I was experiencing, but I couldn't let myself get too attached. The time would come when I would have to go home. I ignored that truth to gorge myself on the marshmallows I was roasting with Wesley and Raine. We ate so much we didn't even have dinner. Wesley had the terrible luck of catching most of his marshmallows on fire though.


He didn't have to be them, but he did anyway.


The next morning was just for us girls to spend time together. It was a good thing for even Wesley and I needed a break from each other once in a while. Raine and I only lay on the beach suntanning, but, really, there was nothing else we wanted to do. Besides, we got to do a lot more talking. I began to feel as if I had known my great-to-the-many-times-granddaughter her entire life.

As I pondered on it more, I once again had to consider if our meeting was actual coincidence or if there was one particular deity out there who was trying in her own way to help me recover as well......

1 comments:

Julie said...

Oh this was really good!!
I loved that she got to meet Raine - it helped her realised what she's doing is well worth while
and Wesley is just adorable
how is she going to let him go?

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