It was hard to ignore the pressure I felt. Each day I found myself being pulled more and more towards going against what ada wanted. I tried as best as I could to think of every reason and excuse I could use to throw away what my own heart was telling me, but it was one of those things that would not be gotten rid of. It didn't help that I began to see more and more of Marty. Riverview was such a small place. We had kept running into each other and had ultimately become friends. He came around to the house a few times a week. All the children loved having him play video games with them seeing as I still wasn't interested in those things. I had hoped that our growing friendship would change Marty's mind about doing certain activities with me, but it was all too easy for me to catch those glances of desire he sent my way. They didn't disgust me. I was facing a situation similar to the one I faced in Sunset Valley where I had to wait to have children after we were forced into the small house. Though my intention wasn't to have children, I had gone on and slept with other men just because I missed the presence of that kind of intimacy. I was feeling that same kind of frustration now.
