It's been about three months since Eiji took Londuil and Ninnor. I'm finally getting used to not having them around. The first couple weeks were the hardest, especially when I continued to be all alone in the house. The loneliness was crushing. After much internal debating, I kept Londuil and Ninnor's teddy bears with me instead of sending them with the rest of their things. I knew the boys loved their bears, but I needed something of theirs to hold when my arms felt empty.
I ignored all of Eiji's calls after he first took our sons. I knew he would only try and convince me to take Londuil back. I, however, didn't want to make all the struggling I went through pointless. Londuil and Ninnor are meant to be together, no matter how much I wanted to give in and keep Londuil here. It was only when I knew for sure that Eiji, our sons, and Mr. and Mrs. Hugh were back at their original home that I finally answered Eiji's calls. Even though we have resumed conversation, I keep every word we spoke distanced. While he wanted to talk more in depth about what happened between us, I can't stand to bring that pain up again.
Instead, I focus on my conversations with Londuil and Ninnor. Ninnor only knows a few words, but Londuil and I are actually able to communicate properly. I'm stunned to see how much he's developed, but he will be a child soon. Londuil tells me that he misses and loves me each time before he haves to hang up. Hearing those words and knowing that both he and Ninnor are happy was what made it possible for me to be at peace with my choice.
Eventually, I did go ahead and tell Eiji that I was pregnant again. I also told him how I had gotten pregnant this time around. After absorbing the information quietly, Eiji said that the task I talked about had to be real, huh? I would be crazy otherwise, and he knew me too well to call me crazy.
The boys and I decided to throw another gift-giving party to help brighten the winter up. Considering how hectic the feast party was, we decided to make it just a family gathering this time around. There was Iselith, Saradith with Orlando, Elridia, and Nioniel. For gifts, we received mistletoe, a mermaid statue, a hot beverage maker, a new chess table, and a new art easel. I was very glad to not have gotten any coal this time around. We ate the hot wings Orlando prepared for dinner.
Indeed, I felt so much better having that party. It reminded me how much I still have, and renewed my faith that many more good things were down the road as well. I can't wait for this new baby girl of mine to be born so we can create some happy memories together.
Since I never got rid of the empty bird cages, I decided to fill the sun room with the constant sound of bird chirping again. I bought a large bird that Galaran named Koca, and a parakeet that Herindur named Teekee. Pararil really wanted to name one of them, but I told him that he and Nioniel already got the chance. It was his siblings' turn.
Pararil used my logic against me by pointing out that I named so many of them, so shouldn't it be his turn then to name his new sister? I said it was fine with me. Pararil was so surprised. He said he was just joking. I told him I wasn't. As long as he took the opportunity seriously, and didn't come up with anything ridiculous, then he could pick whatever name he wanted. The situation quickly changed from Pararil being jealous of his brothers to Galaran and Herindur being jealous of Pararil.
When my back stops aching long enough, I like to take walks along the cliff road Nari and I usually ride along when I'm not pregnant. I'm sure I look rather funny waddling along with my big belly, but taking those walks is what keeps me sane after being stuck in such a quiet house for so long.
I've been recently thinking on my walks about my parents and Eloril. The debate over the border and the attempts of humans to sneakily work their way into our land has gone dormant. The elves were so strongly against every proposal that the humans finally gave up. My family and I know that in a generation or two, the process will be repeated with new humans who won't know how their efforts will be fruitless and pointlessly time consuming in the end.
Eloril has been hinting in his letters that he wants to come back to see me. He wants to see the Monte Vista that I've praised so much, and he wants to get to know the children I have now. Unfortunately, Eloril continues to have work that keeps him too busy to leave even though the border situation has calmed down. I'm hopeful that he'll get some spare time in the future. With as long as this task is taking, there will eventually be some calm moment to come along for him.
The final days of my pregnancy came. It was literally as I stood up one morning after a restless night's sleep that I went into labor. I used my cell phone to let the boys know what was going on, and that they would be on their own for breakfast. I was very glad it was Saturday. Otherwise, Pararil would have been at school and my daughter would have been nameless for hours. I'm so excited to have another girl in the house again. Hopefully things can now fall into a more balanced boy-girl-boy-girl pattern, although a few more boys wouldn't hurt. The total number of girls I've birthed is still a bit higher.
After I got myself, my daughter, and the room cleaned up after the labor, I brought the boys in. Pararil got to hold his sister first, and he smiled so widely while he did. He looked so proud that one might think he was the father. After teasing us a bit by refusing to say anything, Pararil finally told us that he decided on the name Minai. Truthfully, I wanted to let Pararil name Minai as a silent way of apologizing for what I had to put him through by unexpectedly giving away his two youngest brothers. I want to let Galaran and Herindur have the same chance as Pararil if I can.
That's why, though I've been hesitant in the past about having children born so close together, I went to be impregnated again a week after Minai's birth. I need to try and make up for the gap I caused by that whole mess with Eiji. However, I didn't feel so certain about being impregnated this time around. Not that I'm worried the process didn't work. It's just that now that I've gone through with it the second time, I'm realizing this isn't how the Goddess wants me to go about the task. She doesn't like this artificial means of conception. As the creator of life and this world, I'm sure this cold way of creating a child feels wrong to her.
In order to not further upset the Goddess, I'll go back to the normal means of conception after this next pregnancy. Now that I've had this time to relax and heal my burdened heart, my strength, courage, and confidence are returning. All three are necessary when it comes to dealing with the men who make normal conception possible.
A couple days later, it was time for Pararil's birthday. He tried to work it out with Eiji for Londuil and Ninnor to come out for the celebration, but there just wasn't enough time to make the proper preparations. Pararil had a good birthday despite their absence. I think it was because the two of us finally settled on a compromise regarding his love of cars and my detest for them. I helped him pay for a motorcycle instead.
For whatever reason, Pararil wanted to close out his birthday by doing something called polar bear swimming. The point apparently is to swim in freezing water. I politely declined his invitations to go, but Galaran and Herindur eagerly joined him. I did make them promise that they wouldn't make the outing dangerous by staying the icy water for too long. Pararil left for his new place once they returned from their swim. He wanted to get settled in before his job as a police officer started.
I sensed a familiar presence that evening that stirred me from my sleep. I looked outside to find an alien wandering about. Of course, I had to go and see what it wanted. The alien introduced himself as Paguk Vajjer. It certainly was interesting to meet a male alien this time around. I've only met females up till this point. Mr. Vajjer quickly told me that the aliens remembered their promise that they wouldn't harm any member of my family. He was just here to study the components of the ground in this area, and he figured my family would be the least freaked out by his presence.
I told him it was fine for him to collect whatever samples he needed as long as he didn't wake up my children. I felt comfortable enough even with him around to go back to sleep myself. Mr. Vajjer was gone when I woke up the next morning, and there were no signs that he'd ever been there at all.
With some extra money floating around, I looked into ways to make it more useful. I found out about something called investing. I could put my money into local businesses or areas. The money would help the business out, and if everything went well, I would eventually gain money from the investment. Since I've ended up using hospital services the most, I decided to bring my money there. I took a walk there because spring finally arrived and the weather looked gorgeous. However, it started to rain out of nowhere and I had not brought my umbrella.
I was much happier this time around to watch my child grow. Minai quickly turned into a beautiful little girl. I wish I had been able to keep a copy of the picture I had been shown of the man who had donated the sperm which helped create my daughter. I understand why I couldn't receive such a thing, but his face is already forgotten in my mind. I want to be able to see how much of him ended up in Minai. I will just have to make due by seeing what isn't mine in her cute face.
The night of Galaran and Herindur's prom came, and I thought it would be a nice, quiet evening with just Minai and I. Unfortunately, Minai grew rather fussy and the dishwasher suddenly broke. A repair-woman had just left after fixing the hot tub Galaran and Herindur somehow messed up. Not wanting to have to call the woman again, I gave fixing the dishwasher a try. It's been a long time since I've had to do such a thing. It did take me a long time, but I did manage to get it working again.
Minai was still fussy at that point. Since she absolutely refused to go to bed, I took the two of us out for a nice nighttime stroll. Galaran and Herindur returned home from prom at the same time we returned from our walk. The two of them had a great time. Galaran was even crowned prom king! I took Minai upstairs, and she finally fell asleep.
Time passed by so fast, and there wasn't much time left until my baby boy arrived. I've been working really hard with Minai to teach her as much of her toddler skills as possible before he is born. It might seem crazy, but I want to have one more closely timed pregnancy. I'll need as much time as possible to meet men since I'll be going back to the old-fashioned way of bearing children.
It was two days later, and around noon, when my boy arrived after a short labor. Galaran was at school, but he told me the name he wanted to give his brother a couple weeks ago. My new son's name is Ettelendil.
His birth did seriously make me reconsider having yet another child so soon. It's one thing to talk about having another child, and another to face the reality of being exhausted dealing with two little ones while trying to find someone who would help add a third. I'm not getting anything close to a full night's sleep. Pararil also isn't around to help anymore, Galaran's graduation is right around the corner, and Herindur's won't be far behind. Will I be alright caring for so many little ones all by myself?
Actually, now that I think more about it, I don't see any reason why I can't. I've gone through much more chaotic times than this. One more child shouldn't be that tough to handle. Getting my confidence again, I left Minai and Ettelendil in Galaran and Herindur's care. I used the free time to visit my male acquaintances, hoping one of them might be in the right mood.
Perhaps the one I knew the least, Jayden James, was very receptive and invited me into his home. We spent hours together, just talking and learning more about each other. The mood did eventually shift in the direction I needed it to. We found ourselves in Mr. James' bedroom. I noticed that he seemed nervous about something, but he forgot about his nervousness as soon as I sat down on the bed.
Although still the slightest bit hesitant myself, we spent a good amount of time really getting to know each other, and I knew there was no turning back......
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