Gen Two- Chapter Thirty Eight

The two of them had been talking all morning. The empty house gave them the chance to do such a thing. Mom, against all odds, had been home for weeks with next to no issues popping up past the expected aches and problems one would encounter after dealing with cancer. Uncle Blaze had taken her to the hospital for a checkup. Prism and Desire were there as well, for Desire had a checkup of her own. Well, one mostly for the baby. Cerise and Glade were away at school. That left it at dad, Grandpa Jac, me, and Doodle in the house, and Doodle was out in the yard being his crazy self running around.

I don't think dad would have stopped me if I tried to participate in the conversation he and Grandpa Jac were having, but I didn't want to have a part in the conversation. Funnily enough, I was more than done with secret organizations. Even with my lung and ribs being healed for a few weeks now, the memory of that pain refused to leave. All of my movements were cautious and considered. I even stopped every time I went up or down the stairs, like I was doing at that moment, to make sure there was nothing I could trip on.

Anyway, it had been when I'd been allowed to go from recovering at the hospital to recovering at home that I finally revealed to dad the danger that continued to haunt us. There had been no explanation. There had been no details. I told him the reality of The Company's new identity and way of existing, and I warned of the danger. He questioned me how I knew, of course, but he eventually came to accept that there would simply have to be some secrets. His trust over my utmost sincerity in the confirmation that we no longer had to worry about the mysterious organization was tentative at first. I'd been able to convince him though that we could turn to Officer Noble once more for protection. Dad had naturally also spread the word to the others who were affected, hence the serious talking with Grandpa Jac.

After guaranteeing the stairs were free of clutter, Doodle's toys being the usual culprit, I made my way down to catch and then ignore the last of what the other two were saying before I interrupted.

     "My shift starts in a little bit. I'll be heading out now." I announced.

     "Let me get my keys." dad responded.

     "I'm driving myself." I declared firmly.

     "No, you sure as hell aren't." dad retorted.

I huffed and pouted, and Grandpa Jac chuckled.

     "Isn't it great to have things back to normal?"

     "I dunno," dad grinned, "I could do with a tad less bickering."

     "If you would just let me drive..." I mumbled.

     "I prefer having you out of the hospital, thank you very much."

Losing sight in my right eye had come with a myriad of challenges. One of the ones that hadn't been apparent at first but now was constantly causing issues was that my depth perception was totally whack. Cerise had taken to calling me Clumsy Coal. I was constantly knocking stuff over, tripping over my own feet, and reaching for stuff only to discover my hand grabbed air. Such things also applied to driving. Naturally, there had been a great length of time where it was impossible for me to get behind on the wheel due to my injuries. Then all of my licenses and bank cards had to be replaced thanks to me losing my personal items when I was captured. I'd dared to hope that my wallet, phone, and keys would be mailed home by my kind grandparents, but I guess it was the safer option for them to not even risk that. Now I basically had to be taught to drive again as that screwed up depth perception I was still adjusting to had me cutting corners, hitting curbs, and being a general mess when on the road. That was just with a car too. I didn't dare mention me trying to take my motorcycle somewhere. Dad nearly had a fit the last time I proposed such a thing.

     "I did really well the last time we went out though!" I professed to my father when he determinedly stuffed the keys to the car in his pocket where it would be highly awkward to try to swipe them, "I didn't hit the curb once or anything!"
     "That was because we were in an empty parking lot, and you drove us home at a turtle's pace. Your parking job was atrocious as well."

     "That's why I'm leaving earlier than normal. I'll have plenty of time to take my own pace and fix my mistakes."

     "Except we were on isolated back streets. You driving to the bookstore is going to put you in normal traffic where your slow driving will piss people off. That means you're sure to speed up to avoid that, and then...well, I don't have to tell you what happened the last time you tried that."

     "Hey, just remember that the car didn't take any damage!"

Grandpa Jac laughed again, and dad glanced at him before laughing softly himself.

     "Coal, I'm driving you to work. End of discussion. Jac, I'll be back in a bit. Make yourself at home."

     "I always do." he grinned widely.

I pouted and moped almost the entire way to the bookstore. Dad used the extra time we had to make a quick run to an ice cream store with a drive through. He got me a character popsicle I always used to order when I was young, and I looked so ridiculous slouching in my seat licking it like a temperamental toddler that even I had to find amusement in the situation. My mood was acceptable by the time I walked through the front doors where Umber greeted with me a massive grin. It had only been a few days since I'd started working again, but I loved the familiar grind more than ever. I'd taken for granted how it felt to simply have things normal. There was the issue that everyone continued to baby me though. My ribs might as well have still been broken from how Umber and Daffodil refused to let me lift anything more than a few pounds. Such a position relegated me to being the cashier and straightening the odd books left out. The latter was what I was doing when I heard the clicking of soft high heels coming up behind me.

I caught sight of the blue, recognized it, and smiled.

     "Good afternoon, Mrs. Wave." I greeted merrily.
     "Good afternoon, Coal. It's so wonderful to see you out and about. You look like your old self again."
     "I'm feeling like my old self. You and everyone else coming to visit me so constantly when I was in the hospital really helped. I'm still working on all those boxes of candy you gave me."

Mrs. Wave was a member of that book club of elderly women who were frequent customers of the shop. With them basically being a bunch of surrogate grandmas to me, they had showered with me attention, laughs, and presents while recuperating.

     "I'm glad that we were able to help cheer you up. It was truly so awful what happened, and that was just for us outside of the situation. I can't imagine the horror it had to have been for your family and you. You do look better, but I'm sure if you need more time to process it all that Umber and Daffodil would be more than willing to give you a bit more time off."
     "Nah," I chuckled brightly, "I appreciate the concern, but I'm really alright. Spending basically half of winter stuck in bed was atrociously boring. Now that I'm all healed, I want to start getting things moving again."

At that, Mrs. Wave took a small step closer and stared harder at my face, especially in one particular area.

     "You truly do look completely healed, but..."
     "Yeah, it's fake," I gently touched the skin just below my right eye, "It took forever for the socket to heal. The knife went pretty deep, so there ended up being a slight infection. Then we had to wait to have the crazy amount of paperwork for the trial run of this new, experimental model be processed. I think it was well worth the hassle though. You can't even tell it's not real, can you?"
     "No, not at all," Mrs. Wave agreed in awe, staring even closer still, "It's incredible what new things they keep coming out with."

A pause in the conversation occurred. Mrs. Wave was one of the bolder ones in the book club. She got right up to my face to inspect my new 'eye' when I told her it was fine, and I even showed her how the artificial pupil reacted to fluctuations in light by moving my head in and out of the early spring glare coming through the nearby window. It was fun getting to see different people's reactions to it, and thus I was confused when Mrs. Wave's impressed expression suddenly fell.

     "I heard a rumor I don't want to believe," she began to explain, "It was that your loss of half your sight prevents you from entering law enforcement."
     "You heard right. That's a true rumor," I revealed, keeping a disappointed sigh out of my voice, "Dad made me talk to the various departments around Berrybrook even though I knew it would be useless, and they all gave me the same answer. If I tried to apply, I would be rejected."
     "You poor thing. You were so excited about finally finding your calling, and to have your dreams dashed after already going through something so horrible is saddening. Has there been anything else you've thought of that you might be as eager about?"
     "Actually," I spoke before glancing around nostalgically, "This turn of events has made Daffodil's dream come true. If I can't be a cop, then I'm going to run this store. In some ways, I feel like I basically grew up here. Dad and I used to spend whole afternoons on the upper floor when I was little. I love this place, but I also have a bunch of ideas for how it can be improved. I've switched the law classes I was going to take to business ones, Umber and Daffodil are going to start teaching me the more detailed aspects of keeping this place running, and I've got some family friends who own businesses who are willing to give me a few lessons. It'll take a few years before I'm really ready, but the bookstore will switch from the Mosaic family to the Vivid family."

Mrs. Wave's spirit improved thanks to my words, but the woman was smart. She understood I hid mild heartbreak underneath my smile. I was put on the receiving end of a large hug before she requested my assistance in surfing the web on one of the two public computers we had in the store for something she wanted to find. We both knew she only asked for help to keep me from being bored. While it was true Mrs. Wave had issues with technology, I had tutored her enough to where web browsing was no longer a problem. I accepted her generosity gratefully though. As the minutes passed the two of us talked, laughed, and enjoyed good company. Then I looked up to see a pink arm attempt to stealthily reach from behind the front wall towards the door handle.

     "Umber." I called to him with a hardened glance towards the door.

He stared at me first with curiosity before following my gaze and frowning himself. He instantly sped out the door where a brief discussion was had with the one behind the wall. An inward sigh of relief relaxed my body when she pouted but walked away from the store without much of a fight.

     "What was that about?" Mrs. Wave wondered when Umber returned inside.
     "Just a customer that has been causing some problems. She's not allowed in the store at the moment, but she keeps trying to sneak in."

Mimosa kept trying to sneak in to see me was the more accurate truth. I hadn't gone ahead with getting a restraining order since the hospital kept her far away from me, and dad wouldn't let her in our house either. The idea of getting that order was growing stronger each and every day though considering Mimosa did her best to still get to me. That included, yup, actual stalking on her part. Unfortunately, she'd had lots of free time to do it. What none of us knew that first weekend when I returned was that Mimosa hadn't just attacked me. She'd started a fight with one of her classmates at school- resulting in the school finally losing their patience with her and kicking her out until she got back on her medication.

What we all wished had come true for a little while. The parents of the student Mimosa fought with demanded something be done. Thus, with what she did to me at the hospital as well, the issue was brought to a judge who decided to force Mimosa to take her medicine regime again, albeit temporarily. Uncle Al and Aunt Dahlia had been doing everything they could in that time period to convince Mimosa to keep taking it on her own. However, she remained adamant that she wouldn't even with her being closer to her actual self in the past in recent weeks. I desperately hoped her parents would reach a breakthrough with her, because the time period of her medicine begin forced was just about up. I was frustrated beyond belief with her, but I did want my friend back.

That was what was going on with one twin. Things were thankfully as great as they had always been with the other. Holly dropped by my house to get my dog before meeting me at the bookstore when my shift was done so we could take Doodle out on a nice walk while we spent some time together. The rest of the college kids were home for spring break, save for Azure. His school had his break the following week.

     "This place is becoming nostalgic." Holly spoke as she walked behind me, for an eager Doodle pulled me farther ahead.
     "You think so?"
     "It is for me a little bit. I suppose maybe not for you since you don't spend the majority of your time away from here."
     "Makes sense," I shrugged, "Is it a good kind of nostalgia or a bad kind?"
     "In what way?"
     "Like, good as in you're seeing everything in a different perspective that makes you love this place even more, or bad as in you're realizing that you're growing up, changing, and leaving this place behind."
     "Definitely the first. I have no intentions of ever leaving Berrybrook."
     "Good." I nodded affirmatively.
     "Worried I might try to move us out someday?" Holly giggled.
     "Just a little."
     "Hey, you're all set to inherit an amazing house. Why would I pass up that opportunity?"
     "That makes it sound as if you're only dating me for my wealth." I joked.

Holly gave me a wide, impishly sweet grin when I glanced back, and I laughed.

I then nearly had my arm tugged off. Doodle was far too rambunctious, and my desire for a leisurely walk was not matching up well with his need for a good run. Seeing as we were about to pass the arboretum, I backtracked us instead and took him off his leash so he could dash about on the hedge fenced lot while Holly and I stood by the entrance watching.

     "I do get the feeling nostalgic part somewhat," I continued our conversation, "This place brings up a lot of memories, for example. Candy and I used to spend a lot of time here."
     "High school feels like forever ago, doesn't it?"
     "It does, which is kind of scary."
     "I know something else that probably feels like it was forever ago to you too."

I gave her a slightly frowning look at the way she said that teasingly.

     "The long drought since then has surely made you impatient and frustrated." Holly continued in the same tone.
     "What in the world are you talking about?"
     "Well, you mentioned Candy, so that reminded me that it's been a long time since you've been together."

My brain got what she meant then when she gently elbowed me in the arm.

     "It...It actually hasn't been as long as you think it has." I admitted, choosing honesty, especially since there was nothing Holly could technically be mad at.
     "Yeah?" she questioned, raising a brow curiously.
     "We've been together four...kinda five times now."
     "Kinda five?"
     "Remember that weekend where the group bailed on me for the rock climbing session?" I began after doing a quick glance of our surroundings to make sure no on else was around, "Candy came home to spend time with me in order to cheer me up. We were just hanging out normally at first, but she accidentally tripped and bumped into me, which had my head slamming into a pole. Her apartment was right nearby, so we went there. Her parents, of course, were out, and after I was patched up...I dunno, somehow we came to the conclusion that we wouldn't mind taking advantage of the situation. It would be just as friends. No strings attached or expectations afterwards. A kind of farewell to the relationship we didn't get to end properly."

There was no signs of jealousy or anger of Holly's expression as I talked, which was a relief.

    "So that was the fourth time. You still haven't said how the kinda fifth came about." she pressed.

I struggled to answer. My cheeks burned, and I wondered if it was required of me to answer. I quickly came to the conclusion it was. Holly wouldn't give me peace about it until I confessed.

     "I'm not sure to count it as a separate encounter because it happened during that day as well. Candy and I were still in bed watching television and talking. I thought things were winding down, but she suddenly became curious. Even though we had been together those four times, she decided she hadn't ever gotten a real proper...look. She started prodding and examining, and she said she would take care of me when I warned her what would happen if she kept being so handsy. The obvious happened, and that led to us going for that fifth."

Holly started smiling halfway through the explanation, and she was full on laughing by the end.

     "Well, as long as you're not upset or jealous about it." I laughed quietly myself as I rubbed the back of my neck sheepishly.
     "Why would I be? This happened way before we were dating. If anything, now I'm sorta curious too."

No surprise there at my cheeks burning more furiously.

     "Where do we stand with that then? W-With us getting together? We haven't talked about it before."
     "Hmm..." Holly pondered, slightly more serious, "I do think there is something sweet about waiting until marriage, but that's not set in stone for me. If an appropriate situation presents itself where we both feel it's right, then I wouldn't mind taking that chance while it's there."
     "What do you think constitutes an appropriate situation?" I wondered.

Confused, I had no idea what to expect when Holly leaned over to whisper her reply in my ear. It was my turn to burst into laughter.

     "How is that appropriate in any way?"
     "It's appropriate because it's not appropriate."
     "You're such a closet pervert." I shook my head, beaming.
     "Yup!" Holly confirmed brightly.

What a weird afternoon that turned out to be. Holly rapidly realized I was way more flustered talking about the topic than she was, so for the entire duration we were at the arboretum she did and said everything within her power to get me embarrassed. Honestly, I don't know how I made it home with any of my dignity intact. The next several days were ridiculous. Holly would just shoot me this look whenever we were together to remind me of that conversation, and that heat would find its way right back up to my cheeks. The worst was when she did it in front of her parents. That was why I was relieved when I had some time planned together with someone else.

That day also happened to be one of the days were the eye patch replaced the fake eye. Due to the eye being an experimental model with different functions and materials than normal, I was required to spend one day without it every couple weeks in order to test various things such as my socket's reaction, the durability of the eye, and its ability to stay clean. I had just finished taking it out and putting it in its specially designed case when the bathroom door swung open.

     "Glade! Knock!" I reprimanded.
     "I'm only getting my book I left." she replied nonchalantly.

I folded my arms and turned to her.

     "And what if I had actually been using the toilet?"
     "Don't worry. I listened against the door to make sure you weren't."

Really? I was having this kind of conversation again? At least I knew how to handle my sister better than I did Mimosa.

     "Doesn't change the fact that you can't simply burst in here because you feel like it. You would be freaking out if I did the same to you."
     "What are you going to do about it?" she taunted me.

At that, I smirked. I slid my thumb under my eye patch, and Glade instantly squirmed.

     "Ugh, no! Keep it on!"
     "But I know how much you love seeing the empty socket. It's all weird and squishy, right?"
     "You're all weird and squishy!" my now ten-year-old sister thought was a decent comeback to put out there.

I gave her a perplexed yet amused look, but Glade dashed past me to grab her book before she bolted out. The victory was satisfying.

Rosemary was about to knock on the front door when I spotted her through the window. I met her outside, and the two of us were off. The walk to our destination was a long one. However, it was filled with comfortable talking and a few entertaining moments.

     "I don't look squishy to you at all, do I?"
     "Pardon?" my cousin questioned merrily.
     "Glade called me squishy, and now I can't help wonder if all that lying down while I was recovering had me put on some weight. I don't feel like I did, but maybe I'm oblivious to it."

Rosemary reached up and tickled me under the chin. I danced out of her reach.

     "You've always had a little bit of softness under your jaw, but other than that you're as fit as you've always been. Makes me somewhat annoyed. If that had been me staying in bed for all those weeks, I'd definitely have a good amount of chub. You and your stupidly good metabolism."

We eventually reached the decently sized freshwater lake high up on one of the southwestern cliff sides. Rosemary, with no real explanation to give even herself, wanted to go fishing. She and I rented some equipment from the shop nearby and got to it. I hadn't had much experience with the activity, but I was down for any opportunity to take in the good weather, sights, and company. Rosemary baited my hook for me. The fish I was fine touching. The worms, not so much. Her line was cast. My line was cast. Neither of us planned on catching much, so we allowed ourselves to get mesmerized by the swaying water and dancing bobbers while the wind of the ocean breeze shook the tree branches.

The topics we picked were typical ones for us. Rosemary told me more about what had happened so far in this semester of school. I told her of Cerise and Glade's antics as well as how Desire was considering moving to Tinseltown to live with Prism.

     "How is she holding up?"
     "Desi's been doing better the past two weeks or so. She told me she finally accepted what happened and admitted she'd known it had been coming for a long time. She just wanted to hold out hope so that she might get the family she wanted. Having it break apart made her feel like she'd completely messed up everything."
     "Desire did everything right as far as I see it. Jasper lost out big time," Rosemary spoke protectively, "I would have been more assertive towards his parents myself if I had been in Desi's position, but that probably would have led to the relationship deteriorating faster. It's horrible that it's done, but it's for the best that the baby isn't around such a negative pair of grandparents."
     "I agree," I said before adding, "The baby is going to be a girl, by the way."
     "Really?" Rosemary squealed in delight.
     "Yup. Desi found out at her most recent checkup."
     "That's so great!"
     "Definitely. Riny's crazy excited as well to meet her first cousin."
     "Oh, and with Mal and Lavender's kid, the three of them can be playmates."

I nodded before staring intently at my bobber. It looked like it signaled a catch, but it was most likely the water playing a trick on my eye.

     "Speaking of relationships," I pressed forward, "How are you and Pastel doing?"

As I expected, Rosemary instantly stiffened up. We hadn't talked about this at all since I'd seen them in that bedroom.

     "I, uh..." she stuttered.

I reached over to pat her shoulder.

     "Or was that a temporary thing? I did ask Citrine about it because it was clear he knew, and it sounded like it was more than something casual."
     "No...no, it's something," Rosemary mumbled softly, "I don't know quite what to call it though. I don't quite know what to call myself."

My first instinct was to console my cousin, but my brain told me to press her a little. One didn't need two working eyes to see that Rosemary wasn't talking to anyone about this. As far as I could tell, it was something that had to be talked about.

     "Let me try and help you then. What do you like? Girls? Girls and boys? Anything?"
     "I...I'm still working on it. I thought during all my time growing up that I liked boys and boys alone. Nothing about any girl I met did anything to get a reaction out of me, but then I started talking to Pastel more and more after we met for the first time. I felt stronger about her than I ever had with anyone else, and...and somehow she liked me back."
     "C'mon, what do you mean 'somehow'? You're amazing."

A tiny smile spread Rosemary's lips at that. She looked at me with an amused tilt of her head.

     "I can say the same about you. I used to have a crush on you, you know."

Now my cousin was laughing again with that piece of information shared. My expression went blank, and Rosemary patted me on the shoulder this time around.

     "Don't worry. That kind of feeling has long since passed. It was way back when I was dealing with that custody battle. I hadn't been living here long enough to see you strictly as family, and the way you helped me through the mess endeared you to me. I didn't bother saying anything because I knew you saw me as if I was related. I eventually came to see you in that light as well, and now the idea of liking you is entirely gross."
     "I'm glad, I think?" I chuckled, "Anyway, about your predicament...I don't think you need to stress about what you consider yourself. It's fine to not know exactly, for it's not as if someone on the street is going to randomly walk up to you and get on your case if you can't identify yourself into a neatly formed box. If you only like Pastel and not any other girl, that's fine. If you like boys and find out eventually that other girls appeal to you as well, that's fine. If you like Pastel and want to be with her, then be with her- because that's the only thing that really matters at the moment. The rest of us will support and love you just like we always have no matter if you decide to call yourself something or keep all your options open for as long as you live."

Rosemary let out a strange kind of scoff, but her hesitation was all but gone.

     "You're constantly reminding me why I did have that crush on you. Sometimes I think you're far too nice for your own good. Be a little less perfect, huh?"
     "Bah, no way."

Rosemary shook her head.

It had already been mid-afternoon by the time we reached the lake. The sun was just starting its slow descent towards the horizon when we chose to give up on fishing. We both got a few tugs, but nothing had come from them. Rosemary had several other things she wanted to accomplish with what was now one of the last days of her vacation. I made her a tiny bit confused when I declined her suggestion of us calling a cab, for I wanted to walk around on my own before heading home. She was naturally concerned. However, she came around when I said it was nice to be able to have alone time like that without worrying after worrying for months about someone coming after me.

     "Thanks for giving me a chance to talk to you about Pastel, Coal," Rosemary said after we spotted the cab driving up the winding dirt road, "You didn't say much, but you said just the right thing. I feel better, and I know more than ever that I don't have to worry about anyone's reaction. I was thinking about telling mom and dad before I left for school again. Now I'm definitely going to."
     "I'm proud of you, kiddo." I praised, pulling her into a good hug.
     "Again, I can say the same about you. Things have sucked majorly for you recently. I wish I could fix it all up and make everything better, but I'm just glad you're still smiling and trooping on like normal. I don't think I can even say how much seeing that inspires us all, and at the very least me."

Unsure of what to say back, I tightened that hug big time. The yellow of the cab came into view, and Rosemary left a firm kiss above my right eyebrow before smiling, waving, and getting on her way.

I didn't think my mood would change upon seeing her leave. I didn't feel sad when she slid into her seat, and I didn't feel sad seeing the car drive down the gentle, curving slope. That was when I walked back onto the small dock only to be hit with a great amount of frustration. The plan had been to stay around for a while and soak up the peaceful atmosphere. However, I turned pretty stupidly in a circle, glad no one could see me. Some idiotic part of me thought if I could spin fast enough, then the sight I wanted to see would be there. Being alone was the totally wrong thing. That point was when I realized that I could only forget what I was missing when I had a distraction.

I flipped the eye patch up. The blackness curling around like a sentient mist threatening to devour all color from the world remained. I put the eye patch back. I flipped it up again. Nothing changed. I shifted to see what the blackness shrouded only to have it consume more. I closed both my eyes, and when they opened I swore the darkness was worse. Peering closer, taking a step back, trying to focus- none of it made any difference. Understanding my abrupt dismal mood would only continue to decline if I stayed, I fixed my eye patch in place once more and started to take myself away from the lake- misjudging the length of the stairs and half slipping off the bottom one.

Walking down the road didn't help. The blues, purples, and pinks of the sunset swirled into one brilliant picture, but I couldn't see it. Not unless I stopped and turned more than one would think necessary to get a piece of the full beauty so often taken for granted in my life. Doing my best to ignore it seemed to yet again tip my mood further down south. By the time I was half a mile down the road, I was not in a happy place.

Maybe that's why seeing the western theme bar having its happy hour spoke to me. Doing all that chatting with Rosemary mixed with long walk, as it was another mile before I reached the bar to begin with, also made me rather thirsty. The place wasn't too busy, but it was full enough to keep anyone from paying attention to my presence. The drinks were the standard fare, although there were a few house specialties I tested. The liquid quenched my thirst and gave me some semblance of a distraction. Yet, unfortunately, real results to bolstering my mood just didn't seem to be happening.

I muddled around in the bar longer than I meant to. My drinking stopped halfway through as I knew better than to let it get out of hand based on previous experiences, although that didn't stop a strong tingling from flittering across my skull with increased vigor after every half mile I continued to walk. I contemplated before rejecting calling another cab. The brisk wind of the rapidly approaching spring night did wonders in keeping my mind awake. I was in control and definitely not drunk, but I couldn't say I wasn't a tad buzzed. The sensation felt no worse than taking a nighttime cold pill.

However, there was a brief moment when I left the dirt roads behind and approached more urban civilization where I thought I was entirely off in my judgment of my current state of mind. Her form was a dark shadow from a distance, and Holly didn't disappear like I believe she would when I approached. She was actually there, and apparently there waiting for me.

     "Holly? What...?"
     "I heard from Mary that you wanted to stay at the lake longer. I checked around a bit ago, and when I heard you hadn't come home yet I started to worry. I was walking up there to see if everything was alright."

I strode over to her with more energy than before. She eagerly took me into her arms the second I took her into mine, and my head found comfort against her shoulder. The scent my nose took in perplexed me for a moment. What I was smelling wasn't typically what Holly smelled like. Then I quickly remembered the drinking. No duh, of course I would catch some of the residual whiffs of my gross alcohol breath.

     "Holly, you shouldn't," I warned when she cupped my left cheek in her palm to pull my lips closer to hers, "I was drinking a little."

She clearly didn't care. I did though, and my self-consciousness took what was normally very enjoyable and made it lifeless and flat. It was a disappointment not really needed at the time.

     "Sorry," I apologized as I pulled away sooner than she wanted, "It's just been a crummy afternoon since Rosemary left."
     "Well, what's wrong? Did something happen?"
      "Nothing happened. I was just standing there, and I..." I faltered dismally, shaking my head bitterly, "I want to be a police officer, but I can't. I don't want to have a stupid fake eye. I want to be able to see properly, but I can't. I don't want what happened to have happened, but it did. There's so many people who have it so much worse than me, but I can't help but to be angry and hurting and..."

I shook my head even more furiously. Abrupt tears stung the corners of my eyes, and keeping them back was the lone victory I was having at the moment. Holly gave me a sympathetic smile, kissed my cheek, and clung onto me even tighter.

     "I'm so sorry, Coal," she spoke gently, "I wish things could be how they were before as well, but all I can do is be here for you. I love you just as I always have."
     "That's more than plenty." I smiled softly, blinking back more tears, sniffling, and calming myself as I ran my fingers through her hair.
     "No one else is home right now. Do you want to come over for a while?" Holly offered.
     "I would love that. Mom and dad try to turn into therapists the second I'm less than cheerful. A normal evening is what I really need."

Holly took my hand, and after walking a block a headache from the alcohol began to morph out of the otherwise painless tingle. Guess that was what I got for drinking on an empty stomach and having no water beforehand. We found a vending machine to get some bottled water. By the time we got to Holly's house, I could ignore the majority of the ache. The plan was to pop in a movie and have it quietly play while we talked or something of that sort, but the television never even got turned on. I continued to mope, and Holly had no problem figuring out what was most comforting for me. I could have held her forever. She tenderly stroked my hair and the sides of my faces, somehow knowing exactly where to hit to relax away the burrowing pressure. The top of my head was peppered with her kisses, and I found enough solace to the point where my eyelid grew droopy.

There was no doubt in my mind that I could have fallen asleep right there on that couch, and I probably would have woken up to Uncle Al shaking his head and either covering me in a blanket or making a dramatic fool of himself as he escorted me home. However, rest did not find me. My sleepy state stopped me from realizing for a while that Holly's stroking hands and soft kisses were changing in manner. They had been pleasant at first, and they still were, but now they were working with a different kind of pleasure.

     "Holly?"
     "Hmm?"
     "What are you doing?"

She didn't answer. Not right away. Her fingers traced themselves under my jacket collar and dipped down my back and shoulder before finding their way back up to my neck. I thought I wanted to tell her she shouldn't be doing that, but then I realized that was idiotic. I did want her to be doing that.

     "I was just really worried, you know? Hearing that Mary had left you on your own and that no one had seen you since, after everything that happened there's no way I couldn't be paranoid that it would happen again. Now that I know you're safe, I understand I've been scared enough to not want to wait any longer."

I hesitated, and Holly pressed her forehead against mine when she sensed that.

     "Unless you're unsure." she added softly.
     "I mean, it's not that I mind. I'm not exactly inexperienced, as you know. There's not an issue about whether I should or should not be doing adult things on my part. Yet, you've never been with anyone before. I just want to make sure that you're not unsure. This simply feels a little sudden. I don't want you to be carried away by passing emotions and regret it afterwards."

Holly let out a single, quiet laugh and cupped my cheeks again.

     "If it's with you, I could never regret it. I want you. I've always wanted you."

That made rejecting her touch almost impossible, and I clearly didn't want to reject her to begin with. She had told me she wouldn't mind this if it was the right moment, and Holly felt this was a right moment.

     "Alright. Just promise me that you're sure then."
     "I'm sure." Holly promised, her stare on me unblinking.

There was an awkwardness to the whole thing at first. Being with Candy in her parents' bedroom hadn't been much of a detriment given I barely knew them, but having Uncle Al and Aunt Dahlia's room as the only option definitely had me reconsidering. Holly promised me they and Mimosa would be out until quite late, but even after she locked the door I kept imagining they would all come home at the worst possible moment. I didn't fear too much from Uncle Al and Aunt Dahlia. Uncle Al in particular joked a lot about performing bodily harm on me if he caught wind of Holly and me doing anything, but there had also been serious moments where he stated that he didn't mind as long as I was respectful of his daughter. Mimosa was what I worried about. Holly couldn't even talk about me in front of her without it setting her off. If she came home to find the two of us doing what we were about to do, well...

Holly distracted me enough to push me past most of those worries. She was eager far beyond what I originally assumed. It quite reminded me of what I went through with Candy the first time around, and nerves that hadn't been there in those beginning couple moments started to spring up. I did feel even with Holly's certainty that maybe she wasn't actually sure. Something about this was slightly off- a little out of nowhere. Still, that thought wasn't strong enough to make me think I had reservations of my own. I did want to be as close with Holly as possible. I forgot about my blindness and all the shit Buckeye put me through, and it finally dawned on me there continued to be a future full of life and happiness ahead of me.