Tangerine reached for the bear as I danced it closer. She then proceeded to attempt to give me a frown when I abruptly yanked it back, but she was giggling too much to pretend she was annoyed. We had been going through this kind of motion a dozen times during the story I had been telling anyway. It had turned into a game she was loving.
"But when the shadows appeared in front of him, Mr. Bear leapt back into the light. He decides to go right to continue his escape from the evil Dragon overlord." I described dramatically.
"No!" Tangerine exclaimed loudly, still with a massive grin on her face.
"No? Alright, he decides to go left," I changed the tale even though I knew my niece could hardly understand a word I was saying and was just shouting out words she did know like always, "The left route appeared to be full of shadows as well, but, behold, the trees begin to clear and the sun breaks through the branches more powerfully than ever. Seeing a clearing ahead, Mr. Bear takes another leap forward to reach sanctuary under the beautiful open sky."
I tauntingly stretched the bear towards Tangerine again. She almost clawed it out of my grip that time around. It was my plan to not let her have it until the story was done, and there was still some story left to tell. That was the plan- until my phone started to ring.
"The Dragon overlord couldn't reach Mr. Bear in the sun, and so Mr. Bear was free. He traveled and traveled before one day finding a city on top of a cliff that lived under the light of an eternal sun. He met a lovely lady bear, and the two married and lived happily ever after." I quickly wrapped the tale up.
I gently tossed Glade's old teddy bear on my niece's lap. The two of us had been hanging out in my sister's room for the better part of the morning, because why not? Glade also had a million toys that made it easy to keep Tangerine entertained. The bear was good enough for her now though. She happily played with it while I took the call.
"Ah, Midas, old chap! So good to hear from you! I daresay I've begun to forget your delightful voice." I teased.
"Don't be a pretentious prick," Midas laughed, "You know I already feel horrible for not keeping in contact better, especially upon hearing everyone else has been doing the same thing."
"You don't have to worry about it. I was just messing with you. Funnily enough, I have a pretty strong feeling that you and everyone else aren't exactly assholes," I comforted before quickly closing my mouth as I forgot Tangerine was right there, but she wasn't paying any attention to me, "You're all understandably busy. You've all met new people, and you're all moving forward in your lives. I know that until I catch up there's going to be some distance, but I also know that the distance doesn't mean you've stopped caring."
"Aww, how sweet," Midas cooed jokingly, "You should become a writer or something having that kind of prose."
"I have been reading way too many books lately. I need to get my head out of them, so you talk about you. Or, how about you tell me about this new girlfriend you apparently have? I heard a little about her from Azure."
Midas clicked his tongue in annoyance.
"I was going to tell you about that myself. Right now, actually," he sighed, "But, yes, I have started dating. Her name's Amethyst."
"Purple then?"
"Yup, Solid. She's an Education major, and she's thinking about picking up a Psychology minor."
"You should get her in touch with Desi then. She's had a habit of always holding onto all her notes, so since you two are going to the same university the ones she took back when she was attending will be the best you can find."
"I was actually going to ask if you would ask for me," Midas requested, "I didn't want to come off as presumptuous, especially when the notes aren't even for me."
"Midas, Desi helped your mom change your diapers. You're not exactly strangers. There's no need to be nervous about approaching her directly."
Midas chuckled in embarrassment and slight amusement, and then he said nothing further. A silence began to linger between us. I wasn't going to have that at all.
"So? C'mon, tell me more about Amethyst. She's the first girl you've ever dated! Telling me her major can't be the only thing you want to say. Turn all gushy and mushy and lovey-dovey on me! I don't care."
"I..." Midas tried to continue, but another round of laughter had him pausing, "She's great? I'm sorry, I'm not used to this. Um, I actually just posted some pictures of us online, so you can see how she looks later. She's super gorgeous. She has five siblings, just like you. Four sisters and one brother. Amethyst loves those inappropriate late night television shows just as much as she loves those over the top wedding programs. Uh, what else? She can get rather irritable at times, but you put a cup of coffee in her and she's good to go. Otherwise, she's about as level-headed and calm as a person can get. She doesn't judge, she like to cuddle, and she loves my beard."
"That last one is definitely an important quality," I grinned widely, "She sounds great just like you said. Hopefully I'll be able to visit you soon on a weekend or something so we can meet."
"Sounds good." Midas agreed.
Tangerine began biting on the bear's ear a bit, but I hardly paid her any mind. Glade had put that poor stuffed animal through enough abuse when she was small. A gentle nibble was nothing compared to that. It wasn't something she kept up long anyway.
"Any romantic developments going on with you?"
"Huh?"
Having been staring at my niece, his question both went over my head and surprised me with its abruptness.
"I haven't heard too much about what you're getting up to these days? Any new girls on the radar or anything?" Midas clarified.
"No, unfortunately." I sighed.
"That's too bad. You should try to be a bit bolder. You haven't seen anyone since your thing with Candy."
"I know. At least getting to know a few more girls was a slight part of my intention too when I set up my online group." I admitted.
"Oh yeah, you guys had your first meeting recently. How did that go?"
Oh boy, how badly did I want to complain! However, I found myself unable to say what first came to mind. Perhaps it was because I had already vented to Prism, and perhaps it was because I wanted to avoid embarrassment. I already felt enough pity for myself. I didn't need my friends to think I was some sad creature either.
"It went pretty well," I lied, "Not as many people as those who RSVP'd showed up, but you know how that goes. People always ditch at the last moment. I was prepared for it. A good split of girls and guys did come though, and there were quite a few interesting characters in the mix. We spent most of the time hanging out in the arcade."
"I'm glad it worked out. I'm looking forward to the day when I can join in one time."
"You should be. We're going rock climbing next."
"At that big climbing center down on Willowbrush Street?"
"Yup."
"Nice. I love that place."
"I know a lot of people do. That's why I'm paying for a group pass in order to make sure everyone who wants to attend can attend."
"Aren't those really expensive though?" Midas remarked incredulously.
"Just a little. It's used up most of spending money, to be honest."
"You should've had everyone chip in a little or something." Midas said, and I could picture him frowning.
"It's alright. Since the group is still new, I don't want to scare anyone off though thinking they're going to have to constantly dish out a bunch of cash to come along." I explained.
"I thought you were finally starting to save for a motorcycle though."
"Well, I decided this was more important to me at the moment."
"If you say so." Midas responded uncertainly.
I was more optimistic than I had been when I left the previous meetup. Fewer people had said they were coming to this rock climbing outing, but since those who said they were more vocal about their interest in the activity I took it to mean that they were more dedicated to actually showing up. Ten people were due to join me, although the pass covered fifteen so we could have a few last minute additions pop in. Anyone after that would have to pay for themselves.
I showed up at the center early in order to make sure our group's reservation was all good to go in addition to making sure I had plenty of time to settle my nerves. With Coconut having said early on that he couldn't make it, I was heading into this situation blind once more as none of the other four were showing up either. Honestly, I wasn't too upset about that. I changed and stretched before taking a walk around the place to warm up my muscles.
And then I waited. I took a seat on one of the numerous couches scattered across the gym while the minutes steadily crept forward on my phone. When it hit the allotted hour, my whole body burned with that tingle of nerves. It was the good kind at first. I had to keep my eyes on the others in the building climbing otherwise I would have turned around and jumped at every noise that came from the direction of the entrance. That was nothing to say of my state when it hit a minute past the hour. I swore I began to sweat.
Two minutes into the hour was when I began to panic. Had I completely screwed up the date? Was I not meant to be here? No, that was a stupid thought. The staff at the reception desk would have told me my reservation was for another day if I had actually gotten mixed up. I desperately opened up the site where I put all the information to make sure I hadn't come an hour early. No, I hadn't gotten that wrong either. The fact of the matter simply was that no one had shown up yet.
I got a few weird looks from people coming into the gym. Each one that came near me I gave a big smile so as to make a good first impression on these others I was supposed to be meeting. Sadly for me, no one who walked by me was a member of my group. Most awkwardly returned my smile before going their way. I relentlessly kept an eye on my phone and on the group's site. There hadn't been any posts about anyone backing out, so someone had to show up soon. The minutes ticked by painfully slowly, but before I knew it ten minutes had passed. Then fifteen. That's when I was finally addressed directly.
"Hey, you're this Coal guy, right?"
I probably jumped out of my seat a little too fast.
"Yeah, that's me." I answered as nonchalantly as possible to try and save face.
I didn't recognize the guy before me. Seeing as I had gone through the list of those attending, he had probably decided to come at the last second.
"Where's everyone else? I thought this thing started already?"
"They are all fashionably late?" I shrugged while wearing as much of a smile as I could muster.
"Tch, well I hope a few others show up soon. Otherwise this is going to suck."
Way to bolster my confidence, dude.
"Not all that fond of rock climbing?" I asked to not let my composure start slipping.
"I actually do it all the time. The only real reason I wanted to come tonight though was to meet a bunch of girls. Nothing better than to have an excuse to stand underneath them and stare while they're going up, if you you know what I mean." the guy spoke with an impish smirk.
"Right..."
"You gay or something?"
"What? No," I declined, off-put by the comment, "I mean, I won't deny that I've been hoping to meet a girl I click with by doing this group, but staring at a bunch of girls' asses wasn't really my intention when I put this together tonight."
"Really?" he asked incredulously, as if he genuinely couldn't understand that it was possible for me to have another reason besides that to choose rock climbing for an activity.
I had gotten another interesting character to deal with. After listening to him talking about the best places in the city to find girls who didn't want commitment, the best kind according to him, I finally got a name out of him. Well, his nickname anyway. He told me to call him Brom. I figured it was short for Bromeliad, which had also been the name of one of the guys in my graduating class. He had called himself Brom as well because he hated his full name. I'm sure there was something similar going on with this Brom too.
"Looking good!" I called up to him as he started a climb.
I felt pitiful as I said it. My eyes darted around hoping none of the other climbers noticed how much fake cheer I put in my voice. I wouldn't have said anything, but I had been sitting by myself for far too long on that couch. Maybe I was paranoid, but I had seen a few eyes wandering onto my person. I'm sure there were some thoughts swirling around in a few minds of why one random guy was sitting alone doing nothing. There was no way Brom and I were going to suddenly morph into friends, but I at least wanted to give off the impression I wasn't some homebody loser who spent most of his time changing diapers, telling tales about teddy bears, and only being able to hear about stories of full lives being lived from others far away.
True to his word, Brom was clearly an expert climber. He picked out one of the hardest walls to start with, and he still cleared it as if he was going up a simple ladder. I waited a bit before choosing to join him as I put all my effort into hoping to see someone else show up. It didn't even have to be someone from the group. Someone I had known from high school would be good enough. The chances of one of the randomly appearing at the gym was drastically low, but I would take anything I could get. Heck, I began to think even seeing Raze walk through the doors would be a blessing.
"So, you mentioned something about going to school?" I asked Brom after I had no choice but to start climbing.
"Yeah, I go to Crestfall for Communications. I only came home this weekend because my parents needed help getting my grandmother's things out of our place. They're moving her into a nursing home, and it's about fucking time. She's seriously a major pain to take care of- always wandering about the house like she's lost and making a mess when she eats like a slobbering dog."
I don't think it was wrong of me to wish that Brom would slip. Just a little bit, of course. Nothing that would hurt him. Much.
"Grandparents can be a pain sometimes, I suppose," I tried to walk that balance again between being non-confrontational and standing my ground, "My grandma refused to stop pinching my cheeks for the longest time. Hurt like hell. Still, you'll find that you'll miss them when they're gone. My mom's parents passed away a few years ago, and my dad's parents died when he was little. Eventually you begin to wonder what it would be like if they were still around."
There was no answer from Brom. He continued to climb up the wall like a spider. He was at the top before I could blink, and he climbed down just as fast. I was still working on getting past a difficult part in mine when he moved on to an even harder one.
My focus shifted back towards watching the front doors. Half an hour had passed now. There wasn't even a steady stream of non-group members coming in any more. The last of my faith was ebbing away. Brom paid little attention to me unless I was right there forcing conversation, so I glued myself to my phone again for a moment. There still weren't any messages about anyone suddenly having a reason not to come. Everyone was simply choosing not to show up. Desperate to do anything to make it look as if this group wasn't a disaster, I snapped a decent pictures of the other climbers having a good time to share on the group's page in order to give off the impression people did actual care about participating. People would have less incentive to come if it started to get out that no one was bothering to show.
Forty-five minutes into a two hour reservation was when it all broke down. I guess I had to be grateful enough that Brom chose to stick around for at least a little while. It hadn't been a good time, but I don't know what I would have done if not a single person showed up.
"So, it was good to get some free climbing in, I guess. The walls they have at the rec center at school suck," he said, "If no one else is going to show up though, I figure I'm going to take off."
"That's fine. I marked the meeting as open so people could come and go as they please."
"Awesome. You have a good evening."
"You too."
Brom was already walking away before I could get my first syllable out.
I didn't bother sticking around. What was the point? It was going to be just me, myself, and I. There was also the fact that as soon as Brom was out of sight my emotions started going all over the place. A deep roll of disappointment and embarrassment spiraled into a furious tumult of absolute anger. I knew one of the receptionists spotted me as I walked out. I didn't want to know the thoughts of pity speeding through her head. Here I had booked a two hour session for up to fifteen people, and only one person had used my name to get in. Now I was taking off with my head hung low. I couldn't even stand the idea of shuffling over to see if the low turnout would allow me to get some of my money back. That would be beyond pathetic.
Being pissed off beyond all belief was what kind of mood overtook me the further I got away from the gym. I didn't dare go home yet. Cerise messing around with me like always would set me off in a very bad way. With the sun hovering very low on the horizon, my feet took me on a path towards a place I had heard of all my life but had never been to before.
"Girl problems?" the bartender asked me when I took a seat at the counter wearing what I'm sure was a pretty nasty look.
"I wish. That would at least mean I had a girl," I mumbled bitterly before finding my tongue being loosened without even a drop of alcohol touching my lips, "I waste so much money putting something together so everyone can have a fun evening out, and for the second time I get completely blown off. People just don't fucking care anymore, apparently."
"It's a good thing for you that all our drinks are discounted tonight thanks to it being the boss' birthday." the bartender smiled at me, quickly going to work to make a drink he slid into my hand.
It was a bubbling bright red that matched both our hairs. A few gulps was all it took for me to down a third of it. The taste and texture was surprisingly light compared to what I was expecting, but it certainly packed a punch. That, or I was either a lightweight. I really had never had much interest in alcohol, probably because mom and dad had never cared for it much either. Tonight I didn't care about what I did or did not like in the past though. I seriously was pissed, and I was not going to go sulking back home. Not this day.
I apparently arrived at just the right time, for greater numbers of people started to trickle in after me. The bartender turned his attention to them, and I quickly became another face in the crowd.
Hours passed. I had come to this bar because it was known for its creative, non-traditional drinks. I tried almost all of them. Cash did not line my pockets, obviously, but I did have a credit card. Mom was actually the one who prompted me to get one to start building credit. I often forgot about it, but I felt like then was a good opportunity to let it have its freedom.
I chatted with the bartender every now and again, especially once the main sting of frustration ebbed away. However, most of my time was spent wandering around. I took a few breaks from drinking to practice my shots at the pool table. A group also performed a few songs with the instruments on stage, so I got to watch that too. I think there were a few girls that came in who showed some interest in me by way of coy, sideways glances. My attitude, sadly, wasn't the most conducive to returning said attraction.
I think it was close to one when I left the bar? Maybe? I didn't leave until at least after midnight- I knew that for sure. I wouldn't say that I had gotten totally smashed up, for the drinks didn't seem to be overly alcoholic like the kinds you would find in more of a lowbrow place. There was no way I could call myself sober though. I thought I would take a bus home. It took me too long to realize that the bus stop I was waiting at was actually a lamp post, in addition to the fact that public transportation didn't run at that hour of the night. A taxi had to come get me instead. The house was dead silent and dark when I entered. I scurried right up to my room and under my covers.
And then I died. It felt like I did anyway. I was wholly out of it until the sound of my door opening got something of my senses working again. Someone came close, and I thought they were going to try and wake me. They abruptly left though. I figured I was good to sleep all I wanted then, for today was one of my days off. It wasn't meant to be though. The person soon returned.
"Kid, wake up."
It was Uncle Blaze, and he didn't sound particularly pleased. He flicked the lights on, and, good lord, did that make me want to scream. Screaming was what my head was doing thanks to the ferocious assault of light. My temples ached, my whole skull burned, and I felt ever so slightly queasy. Just sitting up was a task in itself. Uncle Blaze's expression when I looked up was definitely not a happy one. He was frowning at me ridiculously hard and folding his arms.
"You smell horrible." he noted tartly.
"Good morning to you too." I instantly scoffed in rebuke.
The pounding sensation in my head burgeoned more intensely with every passing second as I woke up further. It quickly went from being a minor nuisance to being something rather painful.
"It's already pretty far into the morning, you know," Uncle Blaze continued on in the same tone, "Wisp was just here with Riny ready to drop her off, but I had to send her home with him as you are clearly in no fit state to watch her."
"Oh no, poor Wisp has to watch his own kid for once! The horror."
"Coal, I'm disappointed in you," Uncle Blaze responded likewise, "Your attitude is poor, and if this drinking turns into some kind of problem-"
"Please," I cut him off with an eye roll, "One night of drinking hardly means I'm an alcoholic or that I'm even at risk for becoming one. Get off your high horse."
"Do not talk to me like that. I'm not the one who says I'm going rock climbing and then comes crawling home in the early hours of the morning like some pathetic-"
"Oh fuck off, Blaze!" I snapped before I realized I was angry.
It was that 'p' word that set me off. It was already how I felt about myself. I didn't need to hear him say it. Uncle Blaze was immediately taken aback. The harshness of my voice was one thing, but I'm sure me dropping the 'uncle' had something to do with it as well. Getting me to get rid of that word when addressing him had always been a goal of his, but now there was something in his stare that was almost heartbroken.
"I went to the bar because none of the assholes who said they were coming bothered to show up! I wasted two hundred and fifty dollars just so me and some idiot who only wanted to creep on the girls could go up and down the walls a few times! No one clearly gives a shit about this group, and I guess I'm even more of a loser than before for not knowing that!"
Stuffy silence filled the room. I sank my head into my hands and gently massaged it to try getting the pain to stop. I knew people said hangovers were awful, but surely they weren't supposed to be this bad? I flinched when Uncle Blaze softly placed his hand on the top of my head.
"I'm sorry, Coal. I'm sorry no one showed up, and I'm sorry they didn't realize what a great opportunity they were missing out on. There's not many people out there who have the courage and determination to do what you're trying to do, especially when it asks a lot from them. You're not a loser in the slightest," he comforted, "I'll bring up some water, crackers, and perhaps some pain killers, huh? Then we can talk a bit later on."
Uncle Blaze's attitude had shifted fast. He turned off the light, and he was quick to bring the water, food, and medicine. I slept for a while longer, and a good, long shower called to me when I got up a second time. By that point I was mostly alright, and having a more rational talk with my uncle helped me to blow off most of my lingering steam. It was what allowed me to write what I thought was a very acceptable message on the group's page. I had had every intention of originally cussing the jerks out, but what I sent instead was a simple statement that I did know life could be unpredictable. I was fine if other things came up. I understood that emergencies happened when least needed. What I did request though was that everyone did their best to make sure they could commit to coming if the fee for the activity the group was doing was being waved for them before they announced their reservation, or that they alert me as soon as possible if things changed and they could no longer come.
"These damn people. What the hell is wrong with them?"
That was what I mumbled to myself when I saw the repercussions such a message provoked. Nearly half of the group left- the vast majority without saying a word. There was one guy who sent me a private message nearly one hundred lines long proclaiming I needed to stop being so self-centered. He went into a huge rant of all the sob story reasons why I shouldn't expect anyone to ever let me know if they were coming or why they didn't show up, and that I was basically being a horrible person if I did expect anything.
I wanted to slam my head into the wall. Multiple times and really, really hard. Uncle Blaze was sympathetic, Wisp was too, and Tangerine was the best listener for venting ever.
"I do wonder what in the world these people were thinking." I mused.
It was the following day, and the two of us were at the park. We were stuck at the spring riders because Tangerine loved the horse one and refused to get off, but that was fine with me.
"Why would you bother to join a group, and then get insulted of all things when there's the expectation that you actually participate? Why bother to make it look like you are interested when you're not interested in the slightest? It's like telling the waitress at a restaurant that you want mustard on your hamburger and then getting mad when she brings it to you and you tell her you hate mustard!"
"No mustah!" Tangerine contributed.
"Yeah, I don't like mustard either," I agreed with a chuckle, ruffling her hair, "But I seriously don't get it. It makes me so annoyed! It's making me lose some faith in the human race. If I didn't have to deal with people ever again, maybe I'd actually be happier."
An idea popped into my head with a bright flash. A deal made long ago had never borne fruit, and this could be the moment where it turned into something real. Tangerine was old enough for me to not have to keep a hand on her back as she rode, so I took a step away and whipped out my phone. It was a fifty-fifty chance if the call would be picked up, and after seven rings it was picked up indeed.
"Mom?" I questioned instantly before she could say anything.
"Yes?" she answered curiously, thankfully sounding very much awake and even healthy.
"Can I get a dog?"
There was an understandable pause on her part.
"What?" she wondered.
"You told me we would discuss getting another dog after Glade was born, but we never did. I'd like to state that I'm definitely old enough to be able to take care of one all on my own, and since when I try to make friends with my own species I only get screwed over I think making a friend with a creature of a different species is my lone option at the moment.
"I..." she trailed off, naturally stunned by being asked this so abruptly, but she powered through the issue, "You know what, Coal? You go ahead and get a dog. You're more than responsible enough to be the owner of one, and I did completely forget about our deal. Glade's been hinting lately that she wants a pet too, so it all works out for me."
"Great! Thanks!" I cheered.
When Tangerine finally got bored of the rider, I sat her on my lap on a bench while I brought up the shelter's homepage with my phone. She and I had a great time going through the long list of dogs, and I called the place to make an appointment so I could come have a simple look around before I started any part of the application process. After that, I fell back into my normal routine. All the plans I had made for further group activities were pushed aside. I didn't want to think a single thought of what an atrocity that endeavor turned out to be. So, I babysat, I worked, and I visited mom. I did do my best at least get out of the house when I had a few spare moments though. Walking around town was a great way to make me at least trick myself into believing I was having some sort of fun. Little did I know it would lead to a highly interesting encounter.
"Coal!"
The voice was familiar, but I was so shocked that I was hearing it at that particular moment that I convinced myself it definitely couldn't be her. Then I turned around.
"Candy?" I asked incredulously as she approached.
"Hey." she greeted cheerfully.
"Um, hey. Certainly didn't expect to see you here," I chuckled lightly, "Decided to come home for the weekend?"
"Well, I wasn't planning on it, but since you were so insistent I figured why not?"
"Uhh...whaaat are you talking about?" I questioned with a frown.
"You texted me earlier this week asking me to come home, remember? Well, I say asking, but you were begging. You actually sounded rather desperate." she laughed.
"I still have no idea what you're on about. I haven't texted you since last week."
"Why don't you check your phone, and we'll find out?" Candy requested with mischievous enthusiasm.
This situation was having my head spinning, and what happened next didn't help any. Exactly like she said, Candy and I had had quite the conversation a few nights ago. On the night I had been drinking, I'm sure you can reason. My mouth opened and my cheeks burned furiously. Describing me as desperate didn't even begin to cover my state in those texts.
"Were those drunk texts? That was the only thing I could think of when they sounded so unlike you." Candy wondered, laughing again.
"Yeah," I whispered in mild horror, "I'm so sorry. I don't remember texting you at all."
"Oh no, don't worry about it!" Candy reassured, "It was kinda...cute, in a way. Even though we did make up, you really haven't been too open with me since when we were back in high school. I liked going back to that."
"I'm glad then?" I forced a shaky grin.
"Coal, really, it's fine." Candy continued to comfort, reaching up and ruffling my hair.
I was truly dumbfounded. While there had been that moment with the lamp post, I otherwise hadn't for a moment felt out of control. I glanced at the texts to realize that I had started them after I got home. Apparently I had gotten so drunk that my memory had blacked out, but it had at least had the decency to wait until I thought I was already asleep.
"So, what do you want to do?" Candy's question broke me out of my thinking.
"Huh?"
"What do you want to do? Spending time with you is the whole reason I came back, after all. You're definitely in need of a good pity date after all those idiots ditched you."
"Date?" I repeated hesitantly.
"Something completely noncommittal," Candy clarified, "Not an actual date, but still kinda a date."
"Aren't you seeing someone though?" I had to ask.
"There was a little something between me and this one guy from my Literature class, but he became super clingy and a little bit creepy. I cut whatever we had going off over a month ago. I'm all yours, so take me somewhere fun! How about Bagatelle, seeing as it's literally right next to us."
I chuckled quietly. The humiliation wearing off, I could almost accept the actions of drunk Coal as I was rather pleased with him. Fueled by pity or not, having one of my friends around to hang out with was a relief I truly needed.
"I just have to let you know, I don't have any money." I warned Candy.
"Coal! C'mon!" she whined, but she was smiling "You're always broke!"
"It's not my fault. I did have money, but then the rock climbing incident happened."
"Well, I guess I can cover you this time. You treated me the last time we went out, so fair's fair. You have to be an absolute gentleman though." Candy bartered.
"Care to join me, m'lady?" I instantly offered grandly, holding out my arm.
"I would love to." Candy giggled.
"Purple then?"
"Yup, Solid. She's an Education major, and she's thinking about picking up a Psychology minor."
"You should get her in touch with Desi then. She's had a habit of always holding onto all her notes, so since you two are going to the same university the ones she took back when she was attending will be the best you can find."
"I was actually going to ask if you would ask for me," Midas requested, "I didn't want to come off as presumptuous, especially when the notes aren't even for me."
"Midas, Desi helped your mom change your diapers. You're not exactly strangers. There's no need to be nervous about approaching her directly."
Midas chuckled in embarrassment and slight amusement, and then he said nothing further. A silence began to linger between us. I wasn't going to have that at all.
"So? C'mon, tell me more about Amethyst. She's the first girl you've ever dated! Telling me her major can't be the only thing you want to say. Turn all gushy and mushy and lovey-dovey on me! I don't care."
"I..." Midas tried to continue, but another round of laughter had him pausing, "She's great? I'm sorry, I'm not used to this. Um, I actually just posted some pictures of us online, so you can see how she looks later. She's super gorgeous. She has five siblings, just like you. Four sisters and one brother. Amethyst loves those inappropriate late night television shows just as much as she loves those over the top wedding programs. Uh, what else? She can get rather irritable at times, but you put a cup of coffee in her and she's good to go. Otherwise, she's about as level-headed and calm as a person can get. She doesn't judge, she like to cuddle, and she loves my beard."
"That last one is definitely an important quality," I grinned widely, "She sounds great just like you said. Hopefully I'll be able to visit you soon on a weekend or something so we can meet."
"Sounds good." Midas agreed.
Tangerine began biting on the bear's ear a bit, but I hardly paid her any mind. Glade had put that poor stuffed animal through enough abuse when she was small. A gentle nibble was nothing compared to that. It wasn't something she kept up long anyway.
"Any romantic developments going on with you?"
"Huh?"
Having been staring at my niece, his question both went over my head and surprised me with its abruptness.
"I haven't heard too much about what you're getting up to these days? Any new girls on the radar or anything?" Midas clarified.
"No, unfortunately." I sighed.
"That's too bad. You should try to be a bit bolder. You haven't seen anyone since your thing with Candy."
"I know. At least getting to know a few more girls was a slight part of my intention too when I set up my online group." I admitted.
"Oh yeah, you guys had your first meeting recently. How did that go?"
Oh boy, how badly did I want to complain! However, I found myself unable to say what first came to mind. Perhaps it was because I had already vented to Prism, and perhaps it was because I wanted to avoid embarrassment. I already felt enough pity for myself. I didn't need my friends to think I was some sad creature either.
"It went pretty well," I lied, "Not as many people as those who RSVP'd showed up, but you know how that goes. People always ditch at the last moment. I was prepared for it. A good split of girls and guys did come though, and there were quite a few interesting characters in the mix. We spent most of the time hanging out in the arcade."
"I'm glad it worked out. I'm looking forward to the day when I can join in one time."
"You should be. We're going rock climbing next."
"At that big climbing center down on Willowbrush Street?"
"Yup."
"Nice. I love that place."
"I know a lot of people do. That's why I'm paying for a group pass in order to make sure everyone who wants to attend can attend."
"Aren't those really expensive though?" Midas remarked incredulously.
"Just a little. It's used up most of spending money, to be honest."
"You should've had everyone chip in a little or something." Midas said, and I could picture him frowning.
"It's alright. Since the group is still new, I don't want to scare anyone off though thinking they're going to have to constantly dish out a bunch of cash to come along." I explained.
"I thought you were finally starting to save for a motorcycle though."
"Well, I decided this was more important to me at the moment."
"If you say so." Midas responded uncertainly.
I was more optimistic than I had been when I left the previous meetup. Fewer people had said they were coming to this rock climbing outing, but since those who said they were more vocal about their interest in the activity I took it to mean that they were more dedicated to actually showing up. Ten people were due to join me, although the pass covered fifteen so we could have a few last minute additions pop in. Anyone after that would have to pay for themselves.
I showed up at the center early in order to make sure our group's reservation was all good to go in addition to making sure I had plenty of time to settle my nerves. With Coconut having said early on that he couldn't make it, I was heading into this situation blind once more as none of the other four were showing up either. Honestly, I wasn't too upset about that. I changed and stretched before taking a walk around the place to warm up my muscles.
And then I waited. I took a seat on one of the numerous couches scattered across the gym while the minutes steadily crept forward on my phone. When it hit the allotted hour, my whole body burned with that tingle of nerves. It was the good kind at first. I had to keep my eyes on the others in the building climbing otherwise I would have turned around and jumped at every noise that came from the direction of the entrance. That was nothing to say of my state when it hit a minute past the hour. I swore I began to sweat.
Two minutes into the hour was when I began to panic. Had I completely screwed up the date? Was I not meant to be here? No, that was a stupid thought. The staff at the reception desk would have told me my reservation was for another day if I had actually gotten mixed up. I desperately opened up the site where I put all the information to make sure I hadn't come an hour early. No, I hadn't gotten that wrong either. The fact of the matter simply was that no one had shown up yet.
I got a few weird looks from people coming into the gym. Each one that came near me I gave a big smile so as to make a good first impression on these others I was supposed to be meeting. Sadly for me, no one who walked by me was a member of my group. Most awkwardly returned my smile before going their way. I relentlessly kept an eye on my phone and on the group's site. There hadn't been any posts about anyone backing out, so someone had to show up soon. The minutes ticked by painfully slowly, but before I knew it ten minutes had passed. Then fifteen. That's when I was finally addressed directly.
"Hey, you're this Coal guy, right?"
I probably jumped out of my seat a little too fast.
"Yeah, that's me." I answered as nonchalantly as possible to try and save face.
I didn't recognize the guy before me. Seeing as I had gone through the list of those attending, he had probably decided to come at the last second.
"Where's everyone else? I thought this thing started already?"
"They are all fashionably late?" I shrugged while wearing as much of a smile as I could muster.
"Tch, well I hope a few others show up soon. Otherwise this is going to suck."
Way to bolster my confidence, dude.
"Not all that fond of rock climbing?" I asked to not let my composure start slipping.
"I actually do it all the time. The only real reason I wanted to come tonight though was to meet a bunch of girls. Nothing better than to have an excuse to stand underneath them and stare while they're going up, if you you know what I mean." the guy spoke with an impish smirk.
"Right..."
"You gay or something?"
"What? No," I declined, off-put by the comment, "I mean, I won't deny that I've been hoping to meet a girl I click with by doing this group, but staring at a bunch of girls' asses wasn't really my intention when I put this together tonight."
"Really?" he asked incredulously, as if he genuinely couldn't understand that it was possible for me to have another reason besides that to choose rock climbing for an activity.
I had gotten another interesting character to deal with. After listening to him talking about the best places in the city to find girls who didn't want commitment, the best kind according to him, I finally got a name out of him. Well, his nickname anyway. He told me to call him Brom. I figured it was short for Bromeliad, which had also been the name of one of the guys in my graduating class. He had called himself Brom as well because he hated his full name. I'm sure there was something similar going on with this Brom too.
"Looking good!" I called up to him as he started a climb.
I felt pitiful as I said it. My eyes darted around hoping none of the other climbers noticed how much fake cheer I put in my voice. I wouldn't have said anything, but I had been sitting by myself for far too long on that couch. Maybe I was paranoid, but I had seen a few eyes wandering onto my person. I'm sure there were some thoughts swirling around in a few minds of why one random guy was sitting alone doing nothing. There was no way Brom and I were going to suddenly morph into friends, but I at least wanted to give off the impression I wasn't some homebody loser who spent most of his time changing diapers, telling tales about teddy bears, and only being able to hear about stories of full lives being lived from others far away.
True to his word, Brom was clearly an expert climber. He picked out one of the hardest walls to start with, and he still cleared it as if he was going up a simple ladder. I waited a bit before choosing to join him as I put all my effort into hoping to see someone else show up. It didn't even have to be someone from the group. Someone I had known from high school would be good enough. The chances of one of the randomly appearing at the gym was drastically low, but I would take anything I could get. Heck, I began to think even seeing Raze walk through the doors would be a blessing.
"So, you mentioned something about going to school?" I asked Brom after I had no choice but to start climbing.
"Yeah, I go to Crestfall for Communications. I only came home this weekend because my parents needed help getting my grandmother's things out of our place. They're moving her into a nursing home, and it's about fucking time. She's seriously a major pain to take care of- always wandering about the house like she's lost and making a mess when she eats like a slobbering dog."
I don't think it was wrong of me to wish that Brom would slip. Just a little bit, of course. Nothing that would hurt him. Much.
"Grandparents can be a pain sometimes, I suppose," I tried to walk that balance again between being non-confrontational and standing my ground, "My grandma refused to stop pinching my cheeks for the longest time. Hurt like hell. Still, you'll find that you'll miss them when they're gone. My mom's parents passed away a few years ago, and my dad's parents died when he was little. Eventually you begin to wonder what it would be like if they were still around."
There was no answer from Brom. He continued to climb up the wall like a spider. He was at the top before I could blink, and he climbed down just as fast. I was still working on getting past a difficult part in mine when he moved on to an even harder one.
My focus shifted back towards watching the front doors. Half an hour had passed now. There wasn't even a steady stream of non-group members coming in any more. The last of my faith was ebbing away. Brom paid little attention to me unless I was right there forcing conversation, so I glued myself to my phone again for a moment. There still weren't any messages about anyone suddenly having a reason not to come. Everyone was simply choosing not to show up. Desperate to do anything to make it look as if this group wasn't a disaster, I snapped a decent pictures of the other climbers having a good time to share on the group's page in order to give off the impression people did actual care about participating. People would have less incentive to come if it started to get out that no one was bothering to show.
Forty-five minutes into a two hour reservation was when it all broke down. I guess I had to be grateful enough that Brom chose to stick around for at least a little while. It hadn't been a good time, but I don't know what I would have done if not a single person showed up.
"So, it was good to get some free climbing in, I guess. The walls they have at the rec center at school suck," he said, "If no one else is going to show up though, I figure I'm going to take off."
"That's fine. I marked the meeting as open so people could come and go as they please."
"Awesome. You have a good evening."
"You too."
Brom was already walking away before I could get my first syllable out.
I didn't bother sticking around. What was the point? It was going to be just me, myself, and I. There was also the fact that as soon as Brom was out of sight my emotions started going all over the place. A deep roll of disappointment and embarrassment spiraled into a furious tumult of absolute anger. I knew one of the receptionists spotted me as I walked out. I didn't want to know the thoughts of pity speeding through her head. Here I had booked a two hour session for up to fifteen people, and only one person had used my name to get in. Now I was taking off with my head hung low. I couldn't even stand the idea of shuffling over to see if the low turnout would allow me to get some of my money back. That would be beyond pathetic.
Being pissed off beyond all belief was what kind of mood overtook me the further I got away from the gym. I didn't dare go home yet. Cerise messing around with me like always would set me off in a very bad way. With the sun hovering very low on the horizon, my feet took me on a path towards a place I had heard of all my life but had never been to before.
"Girl problems?" the bartender asked me when I took a seat at the counter wearing what I'm sure was a pretty nasty look.
"I wish. That would at least mean I had a girl," I mumbled bitterly before finding my tongue being loosened without even a drop of alcohol touching my lips, "I waste so much money putting something together so everyone can have a fun evening out, and for the second time I get completely blown off. People just don't fucking care anymore, apparently."
"It's a good thing for you that all our drinks are discounted tonight thanks to it being the boss' birthday." the bartender smiled at me, quickly going to work to make a drink he slid into my hand.
It was a bubbling bright red that matched both our hairs. A few gulps was all it took for me to down a third of it. The taste and texture was surprisingly light compared to what I was expecting, but it certainly packed a punch. That, or I was either a lightweight. I really had never had much interest in alcohol, probably because mom and dad had never cared for it much either. Tonight I didn't care about what I did or did not like in the past though. I seriously was pissed, and I was not going to go sulking back home. Not this day.
I apparently arrived at just the right time, for greater numbers of people started to trickle in after me. The bartender turned his attention to them, and I quickly became another face in the crowd.
Hours passed. I had come to this bar because it was known for its creative, non-traditional drinks. I tried almost all of them. Cash did not line my pockets, obviously, but I did have a credit card. Mom was actually the one who prompted me to get one to start building credit. I often forgot about it, but I felt like then was a good opportunity to let it have its freedom.
I chatted with the bartender every now and again, especially once the main sting of frustration ebbed away. However, most of my time was spent wandering around. I took a few breaks from drinking to practice my shots at the pool table. A group also performed a few songs with the instruments on stage, so I got to watch that too. I think there were a few girls that came in who showed some interest in me by way of coy, sideways glances. My attitude, sadly, wasn't the most conducive to returning said attraction.
I think it was close to one when I left the bar? Maybe? I didn't leave until at least after midnight- I knew that for sure. I wouldn't say that I had gotten totally smashed up, for the drinks didn't seem to be overly alcoholic like the kinds you would find in more of a lowbrow place. There was no way I could call myself sober though. I thought I would take a bus home. It took me too long to realize that the bus stop I was waiting at was actually a lamp post, in addition to the fact that public transportation didn't run at that hour of the night. A taxi had to come get me instead. The house was dead silent and dark when I entered. I scurried right up to my room and under my covers.
And then I died. It felt like I did anyway. I was wholly out of it until the sound of my door opening got something of my senses working again. Someone came close, and I thought they were going to try and wake me. They abruptly left though. I figured I was good to sleep all I wanted then, for today was one of my days off. It wasn't meant to be though. The person soon returned.
"Kid, wake up."
It was Uncle Blaze, and he didn't sound particularly pleased. He flicked the lights on, and, good lord, did that make me want to scream. Screaming was what my head was doing thanks to the ferocious assault of light. My temples ached, my whole skull burned, and I felt ever so slightly queasy. Just sitting up was a task in itself. Uncle Blaze's expression when I looked up was definitely not a happy one. He was frowning at me ridiculously hard and folding his arms.
"You smell horrible." he noted tartly.
"Good morning to you too." I instantly scoffed in rebuke.
The pounding sensation in my head burgeoned more intensely with every passing second as I woke up further. It quickly went from being a minor nuisance to being something rather painful.
"It's already pretty far into the morning, you know," Uncle Blaze continued on in the same tone, "Wisp was just here with Riny ready to drop her off, but I had to send her home with him as you are clearly in no fit state to watch her."
"Oh no, poor Wisp has to watch his own kid for once! The horror."
"Coal, I'm disappointed in you," Uncle Blaze responded likewise, "Your attitude is poor, and if this drinking turns into some kind of problem-"
"Please," I cut him off with an eye roll, "One night of drinking hardly means I'm an alcoholic or that I'm even at risk for becoming one. Get off your high horse."
"Do not talk to me like that. I'm not the one who says I'm going rock climbing and then comes crawling home in the early hours of the morning like some pathetic-"
"Oh fuck off, Blaze!" I snapped before I realized I was angry.
It was that 'p' word that set me off. It was already how I felt about myself. I didn't need to hear him say it. Uncle Blaze was immediately taken aback. The harshness of my voice was one thing, but I'm sure me dropping the 'uncle' had something to do with it as well. Getting me to get rid of that word when addressing him had always been a goal of his, but now there was something in his stare that was almost heartbroken.
"I went to the bar because none of the assholes who said they were coming bothered to show up! I wasted two hundred and fifty dollars just so me and some idiot who only wanted to creep on the girls could go up and down the walls a few times! No one clearly gives a shit about this group, and I guess I'm even more of a loser than before for not knowing that!"
Stuffy silence filled the room. I sank my head into my hands and gently massaged it to try getting the pain to stop. I knew people said hangovers were awful, but surely they weren't supposed to be this bad? I flinched when Uncle Blaze softly placed his hand on the top of my head.
"I'm sorry, Coal. I'm sorry no one showed up, and I'm sorry they didn't realize what a great opportunity they were missing out on. There's not many people out there who have the courage and determination to do what you're trying to do, especially when it asks a lot from them. You're not a loser in the slightest," he comforted, "I'll bring up some water, crackers, and perhaps some pain killers, huh? Then we can talk a bit later on."
Uncle Blaze's attitude had shifted fast. He turned off the light, and he was quick to bring the water, food, and medicine. I slept for a while longer, and a good, long shower called to me when I got up a second time. By that point I was mostly alright, and having a more rational talk with my uncle helped me to blow off most of my lingering steam. It was what allowed me to write what I thought was a very acceptable message on the group's page. I had had every intention of originally cussing the jerks out, but what I sent instead was a simple statement that I did know life could be unpredictable. I was fine if other things came up. I understood that emergencies happened when least needed. What I did request though was that everyone did their best to make sure they could commit to coming if the fee for the activity the group was doing was being waved for them before they announced their reservation, or that they alert me as soon as possible if things changed and they could no longer come.
"These damn people. What the hell is wrong with them?"
That was what I mumbled to myself when I saw the repercussions such a message provoked. Nearly half of the group left- the vast majority without saying a word. There was one guy who sent me a private message nearly one hundred lines long proclaiming I needed to stop being so self-centered. He went into a huge rant of all the sob story reasons why I shouldn't expect anyone to ever let me know if they were coming or why they didn't show up, and that I was basically being a horrible person if I did expect anything.
I wanted to slam my head into the wall. Multiple times and really, really hard. Uncle Blaze was sympathetic, Wisp was too, and Tangerine was the best listener for venting ever.
"I do wonder what in the world these people were thinking." I mused.
It was the following day, and the two of us were at the park. We were stuck at the spring riders because Tangerine loved the horse one and refused to get off, but that was fine with me.
"Why would you bother to join a group, and then get insulted of all things when there's the expectation that you actually participate? Why bother to make it look like you are interested when you're not interested in the slightest? It's like telling the waitress at a restaurant that you want mustard on your hamburger and then getting mad when she brings it to you and you tell her you hate mustard!"
"No mustah!" Tangerine contributed.
"Yeah, I don't like mustard either," I agreed with a chuckle, ruffling her hair, "But I seriously don't get it. It makes me so annoyed! It's making me lose some faith in the human race. If I didn't have to deal with people ever again, maybe I'd actually be happier."
An idea popped into my head with a bright flash. A deal made long ago had never borne fruit, and this could be the moment where it turned into something real. Tangerine was old enough for me to not have to keep a hand on her back as she rode, so I took a step away and whipped out my phone. It was a fifty-fifty chance if the call would be picked up, and after seven rings it was picked up indeed.
"Mom?" I questioned instantly before she could say anything.
"Yes?" she answered curiously, thankfully sounding very much awake and even healthy.
"Can I get a dog?"
There was an understandable pause on her part.
"What?" she wondered.
"You told me we would discuss getting another dog after Glade was born, but we never did. I'd like to state that I'm definitely old enough to be able to take care of one all on my own, and since when I try to make friends with my own species I only get screwed over I think making a friend with a creature of a different species is my lone option at the moment.
"I..." she trailed off, naturally stunned by being asked this so abruptly, but she powered through the issue, "You know what, Coal? You go ahead and get a dog. You're more than responsible enough to be the owner of one, and I did completely forget about our deal. Glade's been hinting lately that she wants a pet too, so it all works out for me."
"Great! Thanks!" I cheered.
When Tangerine finally got bored of the rider, I sat her on my lap on a bench while I brought up the shelter's homepage with my phone. She and I had a great time going through the long list of dogs, and I called the place to make an appointment so I could come have a simple look around before I started any part of the application process. After that, I fell back into my normal routine. All the plans I had made for further group activities were pushed aside. I didn't want to think a single thought of what an atrocity that endeavor turned out to be. So, I babysat, I worked, and I visited mom. I did do my best at least get out of the house when I had a few spare moments though. Walking around town was a great way to make me at least trick myself into believing I was having some sort of fun. Little did I know it would lead to a highly interesting encounter.
"Coal!"
The voice was familiar, but I was so shocked that I was hearing it at that particular moment that I convinced myself it definitely couldn't be her. Then I turned around.
"Candy?" I asked incredulously as she approached.
"Hey." she greeted cheerfully.
"Um, hey. Certainly didn't expect to see you here," I chuckled lightly, "Decided to come home for the weekend?"
"Well, I wasn't planning on it, but since you were so insistent I figured why not?"
"Uhh...whaaat are you talking about?" I questioned with a frown.
"You texted me earlier this week asking me to come home, remember? Well, I say asking, but you were begging. You actually sounded rather desperate." she laughed.
"I still have no idea what you're on about. I haven't texted you since last week."
"Why don't you check your phone, and we'll find out?" Candy requested with mischievous enthusiasm.
This situation was having my head spinning, and what happened next didn't help any. Exactly like she said, Candy and I had had quite the conversation a few nights ago. On the night I had been drinking, I'm sure you can reason. My mouth opened and my cheeks burned furiously. Describing me as desperate didn't even begin to cover my state in those texts.
"Were those drunk texts? That was the only thing I could think of when they sounded so unlike you." Candy wondered, laughing again.
"Yeah," I whispered in mild horror, "I'm so sorry. I don't remember texting you at all."
"Oh no, don't worry about it!" Candy reassured, "It was kinda...cute, in a way. Even though we did make up, you really haven't been too open with me since when we were back in high school. I liked going back to that."
"I'm glad then?" I forced a shaky grin.
"Coal, really, it's fine." Candy continued to comfort, reaching up and ruffling my hair.
I was truly dumbfounded. While there had been that moment with the lamp post, I otherwise hadn't for a moment felt out of control. I glanced at the texts to realize that I had started them after I got home. Apparently I had gotten so drunk that my memory had blacked out, but it had at least had the decency to wait until I thought I was already asleep.
"So, what do you want to do?" Candy's question broke me out of my thinking.
"Huh?"
"What do you want to do? Spending time with you is the whole reason I came back, after all. You're definitely in need of a good pity date after all those idiots ditched you."
"Date?" I repeated hesitantly.
"Something completely noncommittal," Candy clarified, "Not an actual date, but still kinda a date."
"Aren't you seeing someone though?" I had to ask.
"There was a little something between me and this one guy from my Literature class, but he became super clingy and a little bit creepy. I cut whatever we had going off over a month ago. I'm all yours, so take me somewhere fun! How about Bagatelle, seeing as it's literally right next to us."
I chuckled quietly. The humiliation wearing off, I could almost accept the actions of drunk Coal as I was rather pleased with him. Fueled by pity or not, having one of my friends around to hang out with was a relief I truly needed.
"I just have to let you know, I don't have any money." I warned Candy.
"Coal! C'mon!" she whined, but she was smiling "You're always broke!"
"It's not my fault. I did have money, but then the rock climbing incident happened."
"Well, I guess I can cover you this time. You treated me the last time we went out, so fair's fair. You have to be an absolute gentleman though." Candy bartered.
"Care to join me, m'lady?" I instantly offered grandly, holding out my arm.
"I would love to." Candy giggled.
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